It is all around me. First, with Bryan Glenn, a kid at my school, whose body I was just a few yards away from discovering and now a murder suicide at my fathers work. It’s all we’ve been talking about, every dinner and every Sunday breakfast. None of family know that every time they bring the subject up I cringe and quickly touch my scars. They always talk about suicide prevention, how you have to notice the signs that your child or friend shows, yet they don’t notice mine. I’m fooling them, just like the depressed drunk with a crazy wife and ended up shooting […]
For years of my life, I have put a smile on my face and told myself that I’m happy. A few months ago I got used by a boy that I thought I truly loved and foolishly believed he loved me too. Truth is he cheated with one of my best friends and a few weeks later had a girlfriend. I’ve never felt more alone in my life. I get called a fat slut, whore, slag all the time. At first I just thought people were joking and it didn’t hurt me. But people never stop. I am so alone. I can’t tell family or […]
Brand new here – hope my email address doesn’t show here. Does it anyone?
To fellow readers,
I know I have not updated my account in a while and I have no real excuse for that. I thought it would be nice to write my goodbyes as I will be dead by the weekend. It has been an interesting year for me and it has shown me that my time is up. Sorry for my language-
Life is fucking pointless. If we all die the world would still be spinning around like […]
I have been hurting for a long time now. the emotional pain that i feel makes me feel like i have been hit in the stomach by a car. My boyfriend kicked me out of his house the day after christmas, leaving me homeless, penniless and i had to leave my pet behind and i know hes not capable of looking after her properly. My heart has broken for the future ive lost and my little kitten. I am numb all i can do is cry. I pretend to be okay, last night i went out and as new year struck, i looked around at […]
How does it feel? Your brother sees the cuts on your wrist. The scars on your thighs. He tells your sisters and parents. Now everyone knows. Months later… Your brother tells you to stop being so mad ” This is getting old. Nobody gives a shit. Deal with it. Emo” Then your sisters… ” Stop being so mean to people. They did nothing to you.” NOTHING? HUH. Thats why i have bruises from Dad. Thats why mom use to yell at me for trying to make new friends. HOW DOES IT FEEL? They are the reason i’m this way… Then there is people at school. […]
This is the note that I wrote to everybody I know, I planed to die by pills. I planned it on my birthday, I just couldn’t take being called fugly, fat, disgusting. I was called that so much that I began to believe that it was true, and I no longer thought anybody cared or that I would be better off dead. I was dead…….dead wrong, my only friend came over to wish me happy birthday and made me spit out all the pills, after that she started crying and I felt so guilty I started to cry too, which I haven’t done in 10 […]
Does anyone care:/
Bulls in the bronx- Pierce the veil
So I guess I am having a weird day. I feel fine really. I am just finishing up on a report I have to hand in tomorrow. I am not worried really I have it 95% completed. I just feel… I cant describe it really.
I have been doing really well lately. I no longer have anger issues of any kind really. I have been doing MMA for a while now, it has really helped me to channel my anger and frustration. My depression is all but gone really. I meditate almost every day. My stomach palpitations are basically gone. I have been building core strength […]
Funny, I came on here to post about how I felt. But I read the comments/posts from some of the younger people here and I needed first to reach out to one of them and say ‘don’t give up’. But I think it makes a difference with age. When you are young, you have choices, hope – the older you get, the less choices you have.
Where to begin without boring everyone? If I’m going to be sad and depressing the least I can do is to try and amuse you all with this trite, common, boring tale. Alas…I will fail at that.
Okay – 52, soon […]
Yeah. Back from the hospital, from celebrating christmas and new year and back from life in general.
Many of you probably don’t know or remember me anymore. That’s okay, we’ll remedy that 🙂 I am back to help you guys!
ive been thinking about my dad a lot lately. I miss him so much 🙁 most of the time I don’t even feel like hes dead, I feel like he gone but only for the moment. I feel lik hes at work and when I wake up in the morning i’ll be in my room, my dad just getting home from work at 6 am on the dot. when I walk into the living room, he had just sat down for the first time since he got home. he still had his hat on and his tee-shirt but his pants had been draped over the back […]
been feeling real shitty so i joined this group. yall seem pretty fucked up but i know where you are coming from. I am considering ending my pain and suffering becuase i have to take painkillers every day and doctors have no medical reasons other than IBS or gastrities but it hurts so bad please help
I was never able to understand the reason I live. Now it’s even more of a mystery to me. I feel the emptiness inside me. Everyone told me that if I dwell in the present and work for future everything will be fine. It only worsened the case.
During my school days, I was very successful as a student but I always longed for friendship as I was not well from the age of one. Looking at kids playing appeared like a miracle to me. My only friends were the books. By Gods grace I recovered from my illness after 10 years. I thought my […]
There’s this boy I’m kind of close to. We talk practically everyday and yet that never seems to be enough? He’s told me some of his secrets and I’ve told him some of mine, except the major one…. That I self harm. And that Im contemplating on killing myself. I’m not sure if I should. Or how to tell him?! It would completely ruin our friendship, but it might not…. I have no idea what to do! We don’t really hang around in person, different friends and year groups but…. Can you guys help?
I can’t Imean idk if I will makeitthroughtheday let alonr the year. thethought of dying and slicing and the sweet release ofletting my death intheair cslms me. like if I could just let the pain go. My heart hurts so bad. if I makeit I’m done. caring andletting peoplein just sotheycan pull out everything good inside of me and take and when they are done just piss on it. I did feel happiness I felt my heart warm and my soul asmilr. I shouldhaveknownthen thst it eiukdnt last I smiled to much and was just to happy.
I spend my first new years alone last night, it was tragic. I’ve just walked out of my shitty part time job because after two years of being spoken down to by the scum of the earth I couldn’t take it anymore. Despite just turning 20, I’m still working through my last year at college. I struggled majorly in my last year of school and was constantly dismissed as an attention seeker. As a result, i only managed to obtain one B at GCSE level and no A levels. After wriggling my way into a good college aged 18, I thought my prayers had been […]
Hey there,
Today my brother talked to me. He’s 36 or something, I’m almost 19. Whe have different dads. I see him once a year if I’m ‘lucky’. ( he lives abroad) I love him, cause he’s my bro, but we are so different…
So when he decided to open his mouth… it came with a shot in my heart. He says I’m spoiled and that I should think of people in Africa, and people who will die for the opportunities I have… That I’m an attentionseeker by saying I wanted to jump of a bridge. He says going to a therapist is stupid and that I have […]
For the first time last night, I have thought about suicide. I feel as if my life is just this huge joke, I have never been so lost. I have no one to go too, and the people that I talk too think I’m just exaggerating things and that what I’m feeling will pass. I was hoping they would be right. So far, they’re not.
I’m in my first year of University and honestly, I have no clue what I’m doing. My four years of high school where the most life changing, and not in a good way. My best friends decided I was no longer […]
What happens if you’re alone? Forever?..
Well..Let’s start. I’m 17. Long time cutter. I also try to commit suicide. It all started after my parents brought a gun to their head and shot themselves after my 11th birthday. Since then I’ve been alone in this world. My only friend lives in Australia and is 11. But I love her to pieces. I don’t know where I’d be without her.
Hmph. I shouldn’t have started either..You know, cutting. Why did I? A while back I. was dating a guy wayyy to popular for me. Rumors spread that I was just doing it to be more popular since I […]