We all have felt the pain of this cruel world. Bullies, insensitive adults, ridiculing teachers, and so much more. This is a pain that seems to last forever. Truth is, it really does. I still can remember the pain I felt when I was bullied in elementary school. No matter how many cuts and bruises we take, we will never feel a relief. I love to feel the bite of any razor, and even cut over the same cuts over and over. Still though, over time the pain I recieve from these cuts dwindle more and more over time. My body now ridden with dozens […]
Tag:
Cuts And Bruises
I could fight, but then I might
All too knowingly invite
Useless hope into this life
A life that isn’t right
Made of dark, afraid of light
Called to empty, endless night
A life that isn’t even life
I could plead, get on my knees
And beg my God to fill my need
But where is He now when I bleed?
And then I sit alone and read
Of those who in their pain secede
To death’s thirsty, luring greed
Let me follow where they lead
I could fake and lie and break
In secret, cuts and bruises make
To cope with a life I long to take
Hating every day I wake
Living only for your sake
Drowning in this burning lake
Sinking down […]
So I was wondering if my tendency to hurt myself could be considered a positive or at least non-negative behavior. I have been in many situations where I was prepared to commit suicide, but I started cutting or punching myself. The pain always ended up overriding my will to go through with the suicide and I just continued until I was left crying myself to sleep. I can’t think of how many times the cuts and bruises have saved my life. I am so confused on whether I should be happy that hurting myself has saved me or not.
Just because I smile doesn’t mean I’m really happy. Just because I’m smart doesnt mean I’m mentally stable. Just because I wear clothes that cover up my body doesn’t mean I don’t have cuts and bruises from bullies underneath. Just because I am against suicide doesn’t maan I don’t consider it myself. Just because I help other doesn’t mean I don’t need help myself. Just because I like school doesn’t mean I like it because it’s fun.