we are forever in the moment as 1 this dream a shared illusion  an eternal cycle of being and becoming and non being untill we find what we are looking for without fear our trueself we follow the trend and look outward but we seek in the wrong places 1 does not follow any religion but quoting jesus “the kingdom of heaven is within”  for we are like elastic bands we drop ourselfs into shit make ourselfs feel and experience negative things untill we finally break and release that energy and let go surrender our egos and fly and be free oceans of bliss and […]
Tag:
Egos
Everything builds character they say, every little gripe and suffocation of my personal image will just mean something more in the end. I will transcend and be greater for it. What I wouldn’t trade a bit of “character” for something resembling happiness. I am 27 and still unsure of what I am here to do every little path that i stray across simply ends with me holding the bags and the jackals growing all he louder. I know that since most humans are wrapped in their own egos, which is not a condemnation of such because it is a natural thing and should be embraced, that they see suicide as something that more or less pertains to them. So when […]
I want to die.
It has taken me a long time to come to that conclusion.
Why do I want to die? In a nutshell: because I’m in intense emotional and mental pain.
The longer version?……… Life is too much of a struggle. Most things I go after results in total failure and misery. I find it very difficult to relate to people on a deeper emotional level. Conversing with people is an enormous challenge. I wish I didn’t stutter.
It tortures me that I can’t even say my name without stuttering. The look I receive from people when I stutter is extremely painful, so I mostly choose not […]
While I share a variety of similar issues and reasons for being depressed than most of you here; I’ve recently come to realize that as time has gone by, one of the main reasons for me wanting to die has become, as shallow but sincere as it sounds: PRIDE. Yes. Before this crisis (I’ve had many) started I used to be looked up to and even though I paid a very high price to mantain an image of myself that wasn’t quite real, I felt semi-comfortable and semi-proud to be there. But now, ever since people have learned about my failure, the girl is no […]
herewith the top 3 reasons why people say you shouldnt “leave”…
1.) think of what it would do to those who love you
2.) Your depression is only temporary
3.) Maybe things will be worse “when you are on the other side”…
Herewith my responses:
1.) Why is it that we are made to feel so indebted to others to remain here in our suffering? Are we here to serve as buoyancy devices for those who cant stay afloat without us? Why do people feel a sense of ownership towards others? We ALL (with NO exception) are targeted for an eventual demise, why think that there is any […]