So I’m a 14 and a half y/0 boy who started this year alright, I had friends out of school, and I had friends in school, but they weren’t my real friends and I only hung out with them because I didn’t want to be the only kid in the library. This went on for a couple months and it wasn’t that bad… at around October, things went straight downhill. I started getting lots of pressure from my parents for school, and I was struggling really hard to get all my homework done and it wasn’t working out. I tried to make myself happier by […]
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I’ve made too many stupid mistakes in my 26 years on this earth. There is no way for me to have a normal life any more. I got fired from my job of 8 years and now I cant get hired by any one. My wife works 10 hours a day and I am only working at a shitty temp job 20 hours a week. I feel like im not a man anymore. I just fucked up too many times and theres no way back. There are no second chances. Nothing will ever be the same. I dont feel suicidal yet but in the future […]
My counselor asks me what I’m going to do when my mother is gone. Â Then I’ll be on my own and I’ll be forced to learn how to be viable outside the womb… haha.
I make hints at my true intentions, but she doesn’t seem to pick up on them. Â All she knows is that it will be tough. Â I told her that there would be nothing, but perhaps I think differently than other people. Â Nothing to me signifies blackness. Â I will neither see nor feel.
It’s the only choice given the circumstances. Â Nobody can spare me from being stuck here the rest of my life. Â So […]
It’s that time again. I need to release this built up pain.
I wonder how far I’ll take it this time.
Some people refuse to understand.
Hello
My name is not important and I have been experiencing suicide ideation and fantasy since I was 10 in my memory , likely earlier, 6 as reported by my mother.
I am 21 now and things are more or less as bad as they usually are in my perception. I struggle with self-criticism, anxiety, depression, etc, worthlessness, hopelessness. You know the ropes by now.
I know there are people that love me and people that care, which makes things all the worse. Usually my ideation and fantasy has more to do with the concept of “un-existing” or “erasing” my life. It’s not a spite or glory or […]
So I got this worksheet thrust at me today (and she even compared it to school homework) about “my intended change.” Â Hmm, somehow I think this is going to be harder than writing an analysis of some uncommon piece of Victorian literature. Â And far less interesting. Â Thing is, I’m not sure how I’m supposed to do this on my own. Â What else is new.
My intended change: Â I told her pointlessness. Â Also in the running were boredom and loneliness.
My main goals for myself in making this change: Â Um… I don’t know. Â To make life not suck?
I plan to do these things…
Other people could help me with […]
the frost of frozen thoughts do stay
where hidden creatures tend to lay
among the canyons of my brain
where ice has festered in my veins
this vacancy begins to curl
and thoughts begin to twist and swirl
where heat and fire once had burned
but nothing ever lasts I’ve learned
how could you be lost again?
I wonder just how long its been
I bet youre fleeing, running fast
and making sure its me you pass
my hearts a bowl of pain and glass
where emptiness has now amassed
carved hollow from the thought of you
but you never even had a clue
shes […]
I was just wondering ,
if maybe there was someone
from wisconsin on here that has been feeling depressed.
I did want someone to talk to but i hate the feeling of having someone so far away from me.
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