College was a waste of time and money. I started after I graduated in 2007, dropped out 2 or 3 years ago and then reenrolled at the beginning of last year. I thought I was doing the right thing. Now Im a week away from finishing my degree and I realize that I haven’t learned anything that I can actually use. I cant find a job in my town that requires my degree because I have no experience. And even if I did somehow find a job, I wouldn’t know how to do anything. My college “teaches” the programs we use. So basically […]
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I think I’m asexual and it’s ruining my relationship(s)! Can anyone relate?
by kahlia
written by kahlia
It’s really bringing me down. One time after the other, I’m rejected and my world is torn apart because of my sexuality. Some days, some times, it seems appealing. So it happens, and then poof, I feel like I could never have sex again. I’m bored by it, it makes me sad to follow through sometimes when I’m trying to make him happy, but I don’t know what to do about me because I don’t know who I am anymore…
I’m lost. Going crazy. And I feel so alone every day.
” Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
Never has a sentence been more wrong. Words are WILL hurt. Words will kill. When someone says a word it can sink so deep down in your mind that you will never escape it. Think of all the words people use to hurt. Getting each and every one down so low that that is all you hear in your mind. When someone insults you it can grab hold and never let you go until you are writhing in pain thinking yourself worthless. Words can get inside and eat you from the core […]
I want a peaceful passing. No drama. No pain. All my life I’ve only been pretending. People tell me to follow my desires. To do what I want. I want my sufferings to end. I just cannot cope anymore.
Personally was never a cutter. Carbon monoxide is what I’ll use.
I’m doing the world a favour by dying.
Lately i have been listening to some songs about suicide and i just cant help it anymore.They seem to call my name.I have been down lately and i honestly don’t know why.No-one is picking on me like usually.It was a everyday thing now its just a every other day thing.But i just feel like i don’t belong.I Fell such sadness.The song i listen to now makes me want to cry.But i love it.It talks about how a girl hangs herself.She pretended to be happy.Her mom and dad come home.Her mom finds her,screams,and faints.Then her little sister comes in.Crying she hugs her dad tight.No-one ever even […]
This is a long story, but, I’ll tell it. I’m 15 years old. I tried suicide numerous times. I am obsessing over a girl. You see, I started liking her in last year, and it started out as a physical attraction. Then, it turned into something else. The school year ended. Over the summer, she was all I thought about. If I was out with people, I didn’t care about what was happening there, I cared about what this girl was doing. I stayed awake most nights thinking of her. The next school year came around. I asked her out, she rejected me, of course, […]
You made me smile,
you made me cry,
I missed you so much I wanted to die.
All of the pain,
the tears I shed,
was worth it all,
when we met.
The sadness and sorrow,
will always follow,
now I am waiting for a better tomorrow.
It will come,
no matter what it takes,
and I will not be the one who breaks.
We will be together,
despite the weather,
and you will be the one who makes it all better.
Give me a sign i want to believe
That life can be better, id do as i please.
With my last dream in my head
My last dream was when i wished i was dead.
Although my dream may not come true
They say follow your dreams and that just what ill do.
I have a mean to end it all.
Painlessly.
Yet, I can’t do it.
Indeed, those before me.
Were cowards, not at all.
I am not mercurial.
But I know, somehow.
I’m too tired to follow through.
This existence seriatim.
I look skyward,
and see nothing.
“Show yourself, You coward”.
Indeed, I was shouting
in the wrong direction.
I have a choice,
between lost eyesight,
or continuing a decadent existence.
I wish I could’ve somehow,
fight against our fall.
If only they know,
how much I love them.
Disclaimer: I wrote this while contemplating suicide.
I wish I believed in God. If I did, perhaps I would be afraid of death. But death does not scare me; that is half the problem. If it did, I would be less likely to welcome it.
I love every one I spent my life up until now with, and gave so much of my time to. I don’t regret a thing.
If I ever were to leave this world, I’d want everyone to be happy – I want you all to know this.
If there was an end point, and I had no other option, I would leave peacefully.
Is intentionally driving someone to kill themselves murder if they follow through?
I am lost and scared and I’m no where near fixed but I am not dead.
I still think about suicide often and I remained un-medicated until a few moments ago when I popped the first pill to happy (doxepin).
I am getting therapy. Every once in a while it will give me something useful but not often. I don’t think I’ll be sticking with it in the long run. Maybe once every few months.
I may be unable to sleep due to apnea or even my sinus being closed off because of a random act of violence back in 07′. Apparently sleep deprivation is a bad thing…
I […]
Be yourself they say . No one will judge you they say . Bullying & suicide only exists in movies , it’s not real they say . Well they were wrong . Things that all of us as kids never thought were impossible to do are now becoming possible . Suicide. Rape . Bullying. Emotional. Physical . Relationships. Abuse. These are all things we have to face and deal with on a daily bases . Things that I have to deal with on a daily bases .
My name will remain unknown as well as all my personal information , but at least once a […]
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