As i’m sitting here, home alone, typing this, i’m feeling slightly hopeful for this website. I don’t know how many people are active here. I don’t even know if I really care. All I know is that I need a place to vent when I need to, and this place caught my eye. I would like to begin by just venting about my setting. I’m sitting here at a kitchen dining room table that’s littered with used kleenex- 15 of them, my OCD made me count-, a red face, and a wadded up suicide note. Kidding about the last thing. I have a need to […]
Yup that’s how I feel right now. Screw it, screw all of it. Everything. I don’t even care anymore. I want out.
Every time I’m happy, or get motivated, or get some determination in me…it quickly goes away, like *poof*. So screw it, I’m done.
I’m scared of life. I think about the countless number of days ahead of me and I feel trapped. Trapped living. Trapped in my mind. I feel insane. I’m dying to get out. Dying to be free. I wish it it was all over. I wish I had the choice to end it all. Why don’t I have the choice? It’s my life. I’m the one who has to live it. I don’t want to live just because everyone else thinks that I’m sick. YEAH I am sick. But I’ve been sick and it’s not getting better. Why the fuck can’t I just die. This […]