so I called the crisis line if anyone knows wat its liek to talk to them its agnozing to try to tell somone to ask for help when all people do is judge and say Its all fucking up to you really i had no idea i understand there just trying to help but i have heard it so much I have complained so much I know theres six billon people in the world but what dose it matter existence theres so much suffering in the world anyway so why do i matter. I use to be a happy kid even if shitty stuff happned […]
Tag:
Horrible World
I sleep at any chance i get because I hate being aware of my thoughts that taunt me. When I’m sleeping I can’t hear them.. I would much rather be asleep than awake in this horrible world
So often… i have so many thoughts i feel compelled to express, but so little energy to spend on articulating and verbalizing them. Even that first line was difficult.
But then i start doing math, and think: who would see? of those, who would listen? of those, who would understand? of those, who would care?
And even if i could share every one of my most meaningful thoughts, with, say, 100 people who would see, read, listen, understand, and care… what good would it really do?
And even if it would do a little bit of good… it wouldn’t be enough… for Me.
So, often, i have all these […]
I want to die. I want to live, but I can’t, because I desire to die even more. I have nothing to live for. The only person who ever saw good in me said that he never meant a word. He never cared about me. I am nothing, and I have nothing. I just can’t take anymore pain. I cry all day, and there’s no relief. I’m tortured in my mind and exhausted in my body. My heart aches with broken promises, everlasting disappointments, and lies told in malice. I can’t tell a soul, because nobody understands a stupid, little depressed girl. Nobody cares. If […]
another day and i feel just as worse as the day before.
i got up this morning and it took me like 5 minutes to realise where i am, who i am and take in my surroundings.
and when i finally do realise who i am and stuff i feel instantly like shit. Like completely empty. Like im walking around doing nothing.
My mind drifts towards the peace i might find if i leave this horrible world. i think about and i chicken out of it the more i think about it.
i love sleeping so much becuase it’s like being dead.
i know people might call me a lunatic […]
so after so long of not being able to see you i went up there. I knew i was most likely wasting my time, but when i got there this very nice nurse took pity in me, she said she would let me see you because of ezra. she led me to that little room where you all sit and watch tv, or play games. I probably should have figured it out by the was that girl kept looking at me…. the  same look i gave the vet when i was 9, right before they took my kitty away for the last time. we talked […]
I don’t really know why I’m here. Just to vent I guess.. Well I’m 17. I’ve been depressed for god knows how long. I don’t really get along that great with my dad or mom. They both abuse me. I cut myself sometimes. I recently had to get stitches cause I went to far with the cutting. My boyfriend of 4 months was really the only reason I wanted to be alive, and didn’t kill myself. But tonight I received a text from his sister.. it said “Hey my brother is talking to other girls and my brother says that he loves them to you […]
im thinking about ending it all tonight, i just really cant bare to be apart of this horrible world anymore, ive been getting nothing but depressed evry single day and each day it gets worse, nothing good is happening to me only bad things, im being bullied by my own family, and i just cant take it anymore. and on top of that i ran into my friend or should i say ex friend/ someone i liked and she was at the counter and i was standing in line at tim hortons and she didnt even wave at me she was freaking facing me too […]
I wanna see your thoughts or beliefs.. Mine are that God wants to save me from this horrible world we live in.