Well, I’ve been depressed for 6 months now. I’ve been on this site for 3 months. My life fell apart during the first month of this year. I’m cutting my loses and trying to move on. I’ve actually made attempts to try to better myself as a person. I’m been going to psychiatrist for 3 months. I’ve decided on taking driving courses. I’ve also went back to the gym. Still, life bullshit keeps raining down on me and I’m finding out that I am my biggest hurdle. I look in the mirror and I see an enemy. I’ve messed up more times then I can […]
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Hurdle
I’m so angry! Everyday I go to school and I only get humiliated by my classmates. At PE(and other classes) no one wants me as a partner. When I stand close to them they go further away from me and when they have no choice left but to choose me because there is no one left anymore they say ‘Not that one’ or ‘Tsk’ and sometimes they even yell at me if I do something wrong by mistake. I don’t get it. WHY ME? I don’t smell bad and I shower everyday. I’ve done nothing wrong with them to be treated this way.
Everytime they do […]
Blackhole depression. Don’t know where or why it keeps coming. I’ve given myself freedom and control by deciding to to take my self out. I will be doing away with myself in a matter of weeks. yesterday cleared another hurdle to doing so. so depressed i cant even type.
Where do I start? lets take today, worked for a promotion for 3 yrs, today rejected at the final hurdle, im just distroyed, my life has just been 1 rejection after another. To the outside world im a normal guy with a decent job providing a decent life for my wife and 2yr year old. But inside im in a world of hurt and pain, my parents have always been cold towards me and that had a serious affect on me, I was abused sexually by my older cousin, and because of the coldness towards me was never able to tell anyone, I blamed myself, I was […]
I want to share my story, it will take a while but the details are important. It’s a long one. I left some things out, like my utterly deranged sexuality. I hope that someone out there will read this and know that they really don’t have it so bad.
I live in the shadow of my past.
I was not abused, none of my family or friends have died, I am privileged and well off financially. My mom left my dad when I was 3, he was an abusive alcoholic.
I am attractive, intelligent, clever, creative, witty, inventive, all that good stuff. Despite all these things, I am […]