Its like a cancer of the soul. Many years of pain and suffering, and the only thing that makes it better is bad things. I dont wanna live. I dont always wanna die. Im like in a limbo or something.
I feel sad all the time. I cant even watch a kids movie without thinking the fake cartoon I see on the screen is the saddest thing out. I just wanna be normal again and this pain to go away, im sick of feeling this way
i hurt today very badly. but im trying to live. im trying to live.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLPsZoF8q1U
this is what i put on when im sad or takeing acid for a trip or both allthough i would say no acid when your in a low spot can stend your mind down a bad trip
I googled suicide and this website popped up, I was aiming more for methods, but this will do for now. Makes me feel not so alone. Basicly, ive been through hell. My whole life, is just hell. Im tired of fighting. If im going to die one day why cant I just go ahead and get it over with. Its my life. I should get to decide when to end it. Not some drunk driver or abusive boyfriend. Me.
I really wanna cut myself. Im trying so hard not too but I knw its going to happen.. im gettn angry wit myself for thinkn like this. Ive hidden it for so long. ..
Im feeling good.
Even though there’s a downpour outside,
My mind seems to find a happy place.
A space that doesnt exist on this plane
but which I create and can change
according to my will
in accordance to the pills that I ingested
in mass quantities
Yes it bothers that im living in another persons body as my soul continues rotting My own mind continues plotting
Against me
When I resist me
Multiple personalities
Collide inside me
Im dying
Im dead
I dread the days, curse the night, wish my life would end.
I guess its more of a rap than a poem
Just like everyone else i guess i have a heartbreaking terrible life story that everyone should feel bad for me for. There’s always someone who will have it worse, who will have it better, who will be poorer, who will be richer, who will be worse off, who will be prettier, uglier, smarter, dumber, funnier, the list that goes on and on. were all different but one of the few things we all have in common are that we want to be heard, to be noticed, and to be loved. thats why most of us are on here. so here it goes:
as far as things […]
i need so much help.. im basically completely alone in life, i have no friends i suffer from severe depression and basically my only and best friend was my father. it kills me to say that he passed away and now im at a loss of what to do i love him so much..
I want to end this
i want to suicide so bad
but apparently i cant
i just cant
Just because of
Christianity
They say you’ll go to hell
Thats just so stupid
why cant we end our life
its ours
The police puts u into a
mental hospital if they catch u
trying to attempt suicide
well maybe o shouldnt be afraid
this might be the last thing i write
so
im not scared anymore
so bye
I have been unable to get out of my house for three months now, lethargic and just very miserable, but today was different, finally. Ive just upped my medication and i feel so much more energetic i have walked outside in the sun all day long and i dont feel like a fat fuck for once. Im determined to drop all the weight ive put on these last months… hopefully this day is going to be the first of many good ones…little panda drawing i did to up yalls mood…lets stay positive for once!
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nothing is the same im fighting for controle im sick to my gut i need a joint im hot and sweating and for what… for love the most beautiful thing in the world yet when it even stagers form the tracks it hurts its worth it i know it is i feel like shit i feel sick i feel so fucking alone why WHY ITS NOT RIGHT iv put so much in to so meny people and this is what i get out of it a life that with out one person in it will end up back were it was why i dont know […]
i feel nothing i laugh and cry druing the day then i come to this were i feel nothing did the day meen anything i whant to cry and evrey tiem i get cloce to the tears i yern for thay stop i whant to feel the blood run down my arm agine i whant to feel sick as i look at it agine i whant her as i wrote that the tears have come i whant her llike it was i felt the change when she got bad it felt like a punch in the belly
i havent thought this in a long time because im […]
I know sometimes you don’t want the seemingly useless advice people give you. That’s what I’ve seen anyway.
Im not a therapist; I myself am not in a decent state, but if you want to talk about anything and everything without constant advice feel free to contact me.
georgiahjones@googlemail.com
how meny roads must a man walk down befor you can call him a man
my favoret song i never understould it not really but its about the vam war
but i still conect with it evrey were i look i see death
im sorry but tonight iv got to go to bed all the guys iv messaged im sorry i just cant to meny bad memoreys have come back tonigh
i just howled like a man on fire at the moon… it hurts so much not being abel to talk to her some times and haveing a depreshoin spike now is really not helping i cant even tell her i dont whant to it could hurt her ni just whant to crawl back in to the hole i came from and sleep for ever escape iv got to stay on my feet i whant to yell agine its like a fire i whant to run about the wood yelling and screeming my frustrashion at the world she will understand my paine the woods are her voce and […]
I guess most people here have a reason to be depressive, either their hard childhood or a disease or whatsoever.
I was bullied all trough highschool and all but after highschool life was pretty good, from abou 16 to 19 my life was somewhat normal, had lots of relationship and sex, i was passionate i had friends, all that jazz, but then came hypothyrodism and it just went downhill from there and now im almost 25 and its been a damn hard ride with about 10% good time and 90% horrible aching depressing inside pain. For a while the huge amount of hair loss from thyroid […]
This is going to be my first post in a while but ill try to keep things concise.
Im a guy aged 20 studying in university at the moment. Im writing this because last time I was here a few years back somebody told me that age old cliche things get better with time.. But im still waiting and the last few weeks have just gotten harder and harder.
I keep wanting to talk to someone but being from a not particularly close family ive sort of grown up never discussing feelings and problems, and when I try it feels too much like counselling again and […]
i havent been on here for a long time iv seen some shit im my time (god i sound like a vam vet !) but you know that dont meen shit people stoped calling me emo now im the hippie guy who smile all the time no one can seem to get to him some one said theres something abotu my eyes something dark if only she knew but ill tell you what ever sins i droped acid once no more no less its opened my mind just enough to let the light and truth in the people are lieing to you the world loves you and its beautiful you […]