there are an awful lot of stories on this site, but every story is different right? the base feelings of despair are mixed into all of them, but how you came to be there and what you plan to do is always different. most of us are suicidal, hence the name “the suicide project” i suppose. i am no exception. but maybe it’s time i told the whole story of how i came to be here and what i plan to do.
my story is not filled with rape or abuse or anything like that. ive never been the loner at the back of the […]
Tag:
Instances
After typing up a ridiculously long post yesterday, I felt better. I actually did, the writing seemed to flow out from my very soul and the pain diminished. However, that only lasted for a few hours.
And then the urges came again, you know the ones. The one that tells you to end it, not for yourself but for those around you. You are not worthy of their love, all you’re doing is dragging them down with you. They don’t deserve this. The last one, I’ll admit. They do not deserve this. And that’s why they don’t know the full extent of my depressive state.
Instead of […]
hey, there have been a lot of instances when i did something wrong and people would usually stand up for me and i would feel that no i did not do wrong, i was right. but this time, nobody wants to stand up for me, and it feel so bad. i did this thing for everybody’s and my own good and it is really wrong that when i am in a big prob nobody just wants to give me some medical/financial support for it. they all wanted me to do it, that’s why i did it. now i just cant get a hard on. the […]
I’ve come to the conclusion that im a complete waste of space, and i want to eliminate this pointless shitstain of an existence i call a life from the face of the earth.
My whole life i was labeled ugly and worthless, and any word that can add the prefix “un” would describe me. Im unathletic, untalented, unattractive, unimportant, unmotivated, uninteresting, unappealing, basically anything you can think of.
I grew up with my father always angry, and telling me i was a worthless human being. He would say it was his way of building me up to be a man, but all it did was make me […]