A week leading up to my death, well that will be worth documenting. Next week my family is out of town, which means I will have plenty of time to die. So now I know the date, am I scared? No. Excited? Possibly, at least more so than scared. It feels kind of like planning a fun camping trip except I will not come back. Either way, planning is fun, or that could be my OCD, I don’t know. So what will my last day look like? Well I will wake up probably late and take plenty of time to rest. I will smoke a […]
Tag:
Last Meal
Well today is the day, im finally leaving this horrible life of mine. I have discovered somethings recently that have become the straw that broke the camels back. So im taking care of the problem, and that problem is me. You can call me selfish, i dont care, i know i am. If its selfish to end my life to end the pain and lonliness i have been dealing with my whole life, then so be it. No one will miss me, because i dont give a shit about anyone anymore. People say that killing yourself is wasting god’s gift. Well i dont believe that […]
As someone who’s survived 3 serious attempts I wish to say that I have no intention of making it through number four. I’ve finally arrived at the conclusion that I’m statistically supposed to be dead by now and it’s not something which makes me feel better. I’ve seen so much pain on my short tour here on Earth. Humanity does little to stoke my optimism, in fact it does the opposite. I’m a vet, I’m mentally unstable, I’m single, I’m unemployed for the fourth year running and I’m almost homeless (I already was for 3 years.) A close friend who I met while being homeless committed suicide via alcohol and prescription […]
So, I’ve set the date on the 31st of January. I thought that it would give me ample time to do the things I still want to do like play, watch, eat, etc.  However, I ran into a little snag that surprised me. I’m running out of cash, and thus, I probably have a two or three days worth of takeout left. So annoying. Of course, I could always go out to the cash machine down the street, but get real. I’m a recluse who hasn’t set foot outside my flat for months. I haven’t even taken out five months worth of garbage, so you can […]
Moved back in with ex on my bday, she cried said she missed me and the kids.
A week later i was homeless, me moving in was a ploy to get custody of the kids
Then i spent weeks humiliating myself trying to get her to love me?!?! wtf is wrong with me
A poem on here made me cry. The crappy rice made me cry. Knowing it was my last meal i guess.
I loved you.
I love our girls.
The rest of the world, i’m not too fond of.
I went to that 12 week sexual abuse survivor workshop so i could figure out where all the hurt in me […]