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Setting in…

by Deathy058 10/22/2014

written by Deathy058

I am not certain what to type here.

A few years ago these tendencies, these thoughts, would feel foreign to me. To put it mildly, life was pretty good. I had a significant other who wanted to marry me, I was a straight A college student, and I had a broad pick of graduate programs to further my degree.

Now?

Enter the cliche story; she left me for a friend, college ended into a dead end midnight job, and graduate school did not work out. After diving in the deep end into jobs just to stay afloat for the past year, I am now left jobless(at 26), and I had […]

10/22/2014 12 comments

The Conundrum

by allout 10/22/2014

written by allout

I’m 46. I’ve lived half of my life already. I’ve been reading through some of the posts, getting an idea of the thoughts – no surprises really. I have been in the place I am now for about 9 months, and off and on over the last 31+ years. That’s a long time to carry burdens.

I do have grown children. Children. The big debate. I did read a post from someone left behind who in an obvious state of anger blamed the departed for leaving them behind selfishly. I have to say there is absolutely no way to assure those that will be left behind […]

10/22/2014 4 comments

10 days left

by Roars Kilde 10/22/2014

written by Roars Kilde

And I still can’t do anything.
It doesn’t even feel like something big hanging over my head, I know it’s coming, I know there is probably several possibilities to avoid it, but at this point, I just don’t care anymore.

I thought maybe the closer it got and it would be that kick in the butt I needed to do something, do anything. Instead it’s just more of the same, the days are the same as they’ve always been. But it doesn’t upset me, it doesn’t even worry me, I know it’s going to happen, and I realize what it means. And I still just don’t […]

10/22/2014 6 comments

Gough

by kontinkatink 10/21/2014

written by kontinkatink

Yeah well I’m gonna be the first and I’m going to alienate some people here, but we, in Australia, just lost a visionary in Gough Whitlam. Wow, what a mark he left on our land and our consciousness. He was a visionary and a reformist. To some he made have tried to do too much but what a legacy he left in just a short time. Not many people get to do what he did and I personally want to bring his achievements to this site. Please explore this great man in Australian politics. Few get the chance to make their mark…he did. Vale Gough […]

10/21/2014 1 comment

Life

by Trem 10/21/2014

written by Trem

Today I found out for sure that my girlfriend was cheating on me.

I have battled depression in the past, sadly each time it seems to centre around a female. I am now 23, 24 in a bit more than a week. I guess I will start.. at the start…

I was only 14 or 15 at the time. This beautiful girl at my school had started talking to me, I had a crush on her long before but I was never really the one to say anything. I was Year 10 and she was Year 8. I was pretty young but this girl had taken me […]

10/21/2014 4 comments

Protected: Dear Jes,

by AarinaDaae 10/21/2014

written by AarinaDaae

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

10/21/2014 0 comment

“Stop”

by Bisban 10/19/2014

written by Bisban

I told hell to bring it
I prayed to be different
Is the chain too many more
Don’t leave me in the reaches
Let me hop, let me trip like a frog
Can you appear dark angel in my fog
Or am I, I can not make it left
I want to be a pirate of death

10/19/2014 0 comment

11:57

by Bisban 10/18/2014

written by Bisban

Dire deepest in darkness

I have no more left

Is there only one left

Who am I and who are you

Are you from the underworld

Indeed we are from hell

But there is only one

Heaven is lost on Earth

I am the Spawn, I am here to save

The chain, one thousand year

First I need to die

In your black robe, can you be

For me, The light and the scythe

10/18/2014 0 comment

Trusting no one.

by Delisnak 10/17/2014

written by Delisnak

Lately I’ve been trusting no one. My “best friend” said she didn’t want to be my friend anymore when she found out I was emo.I’ve known her since I was 6 and now I’m 12 almost 13. Also one of my guy friends from school turned his back on me and started calling my names. Past friends have left me also,my dad and step mom found out that I’ve cut myself, my sister was being nosy and heard what we were saying and went and told all her friends. Some of my friends know about it too from my sister. I just hope that my […]

10/17/2014 2 comments

Ready For My End

by Brink of Dawn 10/16/2014

written by Brink of Dawn

Note: I am still adding to this.

The last straw was pulled today. My boyfriend, who I love with my entire being and essence, left me because I am “weak” and “no one wants to be with a suicidal person”.

Now before you jump to the conclusion that I am a stupid dumb teenage ***** who doesn’t know what real pain is, let me tell you that yes, I do, in fact, know what real pain is. Real emotional pain. My pain stems from multiple branches – severe social anxiety, low self-esteem, self-hatred, countless bad experiences, and loneliness. These all intertwine with eachother, every item overwhelming […]

10/16/2014 5 comments

giving up the gun

by crescentshapeddepression 10/14/2014

written by crescentshapeddepression

I don’t know what to do anymore. It’s all so standard. I’m not giving up, mom. Lying in bed every day, not caring about anyone who never cared about me. I’m not giving up, dad. Sleeping until 5pm, popping the pills they gave me to relax. I’m not giving up. I just don’t know what to do since you’ve left. If you left, what’s keeping me here? I’m not giving up.

10/14/2014 0 comment

About you.

by hellblau 10/13/2014

written by hellblau

8/09/14
4:10 am

He had eyes like coffee and hair like bread, skin like winter and brain like hell. He had lips like razors and heart like sun. He had beard like leafs and touch as cold. He loved me like spring, and left like the wind. He changed like the seasons, forgetting me.

10/13/2014 2 comments

Waiting

by bipolary 10/7/2014

written by bipolary

On my wrists and at my feet,

My containment, now complete.

To hell they say, will be my way –

Leaving dreams to fade away.

Hollow now, I sit and stare –

Recalling deeds that got me there.

I hope my friend will come to call,

Dressed for death and standing tall.

Ready now, I close my eyes –

My heart is slow and tranquilized.

Surrender now – the only way

I wait for him to call by day.

Late last night he left my bed,

And took the halo from my head.

An empty shell was left behind,

A pretty face without a mind.

I sit within my gilded cage,

The need has left to turn the page.

Crying out brings no […]

10/7/2014 6 comments

A special gift……

by PeelASquid 10/7/2014

written by PeelASquid

Found in the sea,

Your gift to me.

You saved me that night.

Almost losing the fight.

You left it there,

So I’d know you care.

Found so I’d know,

Wherever I go.

Your soul is with me,

So says the “tree”

But the real treasure is you.

I love you true.

10/7/2014 6 comments

oxycontin

by lorcaking 10/5/2014

written by lorcaking

do you have any idea how much oxycontin it would take? I take 60 mg TID. I have 60 left. Most I ever have is 90.

10/5/2014 3 comments

The worlds a stage, and I’m exiting stage left soon

by bennett211085 10/4/2014

written by bennett211085

Hello, the guy I’ve been reading about on here getting his life destroyed by zero hedge… Well mate my situation is 200x more scifi than that, gangstalking target world famous me, youtube spongebobs secret tv channel 🙂 the person who had the mushroom trip and realised everything only to remember the very small details you can comprehend, me too! this place is nothing but a game show, the world, and the universe at that 😉 and everyone with hurtful non caring families, My step dad of ten years tried to have me raped and killed twice, my dad ran away because he was scared, and […]

10/4/2014 12 comments

It’s Over

by lexthompson6 10/1/2014

written by lexthompson6

Hello all,

This is not a suicide note. Nor is it a plea for help, understanding, and it’s definitely not intended to try and scour out techniques and methods for end of life. I know what I’m prepared to do (helium exit bag seems to be the winning candidate so far) and I’ve set a date for December 1st. I did this because what little hope I have left (eroding by the minute – literally), things might (but probably wont – story of my life) turn around.

I joined this board because for years I’ve been thinking of ending my life. I’m a complete and total failure and […]

10/1/2014 10 comments

Continuing to live for the sake of others

by Stuie 10/1/2014

written by Stuie

Most people will say I’m one of the most cheerful people around but the truth is I’m not a happy person and I haven’t been for quite a long time. Nearly 2 and a half decades of putting on a smile for people has left me exhausted both emotionally and physically. I’ve lost all motivation in my life, I just want to end it and the only thing stopping me is I’m too afraid of the truama I’ll cause my family, my brothers look up to me and I’ve only started getting along with my parents again. I know that living will keep them happy […]

10/1/2014 3 comments

Just thinking

by hopeisafourletterword 9/30/2014

written by hopeisafourletterword

Robin Williams was so incredibly fortunate to be able to die on his own terms and still have the popular opinion in his favor. It doesn’t seem to be socially acceptable to judge him or call him a coward for what he did. Rather, people are still celebrating his life and all the good he’s done, and this is what we’ll pass down to future generations. They’ll never think seriously about how he died, just his amazing talent and the legacy he left behind. It’s amazing how different it is for so many others who ended their lives.

9/30/2014 2 comments

Getting really good at tying a noose

by deadincalgary 9/27/2014

written by deadincalgary

I don’t know why, I told my wife that I hate her. I do t hate her at all, it’s just easier to push people away so taking your own life will be easier. As I’m writing this I’m looking for a long enough extension cord in my garage so that I can hang myself. I’m going to make it easy on my wife and call the police before I kick the stool out from under me so that they find me and not her. I’m not an abusive husband, I work very hard to provide for my wife and son. I just think it […]

9/27/2014 2 comments

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