I feel like I am a failure at life, I also feel like I hate myself. Whenever I tell someone that I dislike my life, they tell me, “Oh theres ppl starving living on the streets.” See thats what I hate, when people tell me that. It’s almost like they are telling me that its my job to be happy because I am not that person. It’s hard for me to be happy, to motivate myself, to try something new, or just go out for random things. I always want to be by myself, or at least tell myself that. I get bored with everything, […]
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Living On The Streets
i was fed up the other day of fighting just to survive everyday, you see, i’ve been living on the streets for a couple of months and life if just getting worse and worse by the day… i dont have any money for food or drink as the goverment have fucked my benfit claim up so i have had to beg everyday, mostly unsuccesfully, for food and/or drink.. i have lost everything in life and was at the point of giving up… i gathered a few sharp objects (broken cup, glass, needle and empty can) and started hacking at my arm, making a ‘T-shaped’ gash which […]
Today i live in a nice two story apartment, its safe and secure, its not on the ground floor, its quite. (I love the quite) I have a full time job, good friends and i can say that i am honestly happy again. But my life was not always this way.
A few years ago i was living on the streets, i had no money, no was looking for me because they knew where i was, i was depressed and high and i had given up on life, and my then family and friends had all given up on me. (Its not their fault, i was being a totally […]
So my last post here was this one
http://suicideproject.org/2011/11/tonights-the-night-i-guess/
Long story short, after writing that, I waited until midnight, walked out to the Golden Gate Bridge, looked over the railing, and got ready to jump. I waited until midnight because I didn’t want anyone to actually see me die, and I know that security around there tends to watch out for any potential jumpers. Anyways, so I’m standing there, trying to talk myself into finally ending it all, when some bicyclist on the other side of the bridge yells over “Hey! What the fuck are you doing?!”. Or something to that effect anyways.
I looked over at him, […]