Do you know that moment when you don’t know what to do anymore. When your world is crashing down but you still have a stupid smile on your face. This is all happening to me,& I’m losing it. Yeah people out there have it worse than me & I shouldn’t be complaining but it’s just to much to handle. I just want to end it & leave it all behind. I have nothing to much to lose. The people who once gave a damn  about me just gave up on me. Now a couple days ago I lost the person I love thanks to my […]
Tag:
Pain In The Ass
Life and luck is such a pain in the ass at times. Here I am having lived with only 26 cents to my name and a few packs of Raman Noodles for the past 4 days.
I am really tired of surviving on noodles!!!!
Today I received my socal security check and the first thing I did was to buy some groceries and pay my past due room rent. Things have been tough for the last week; I could have really used some money for food.
Today, I was folding a pair of shorts that I had not used 5 months and felt a lump in the pocket: The […]
I keep getting told “hang in there, things will get better!” – well they’ve been getting steadily worse for 3 years, and that was when I finally managed to overcome bulimia so I wasn’t exactly happy at that point anyway! I’m now very overweight, single, lonely, hiding from the world, i always fall for the guys who dont want me, and generally a burden and pain in the ass to the few people who still want to be my friend and my family, I just don’t want to do this any more, I don’t want this daily struggle any more. I feel like my life […]
There’s nothing wrong with my life, besides the fact that I’m a useless leech. I’m 28 and haven’t done a damn thing with my life. I’ve always been told that it’s because I’m lazy, and I’ve accepted it. I’ve been sad for no *good* reason for most of my life (plenty of shallow reasons–too stupid, too ugly, too awkward, etc, etc). Attempted suicide once, many years ago. Woke up in intensive care to suffer massive guilt from my mother. My dad wouldn’t speak to me for almost a year after that–just flat out ignored me, though we lived in the same house. (Because of course […]
I’m pretty much as broken and useless as it’s possible to be. I can’t do anything right – not exaggerating, it’s the truth. I’m barely human and don’t really do the things that normal humans do or feel the way normal humans feel. When I’m hurt or frustrated I get angry – but real people don’t feel anger, don’t express those things. Real people are happy most of the time, not unhappy or angry most of the time. I’m just wrong. Broken. Unfit for human consumption. God I wish my mother had aborted me. What is the point of me? There is none. The worst […]
I guess I thought going back to school was going to make me feel better. I thought it’d make my depression and anxiety go away and I’d be instantly better..but it didn’t. I’m still depressed and miserable, I still feel useless. I just want to be gone. The things that made me happy don’t even make me happy anymore. They’re just nice distractions, because when I really think about it, I’m not happy. I literally have no one. I just feel like a burden to my family. I know, there’s people on here that’s problems are far more worse than my own, and even now […]