Hi, I suffer from Manic Depression . Not many in my school know that. They think i’m happy, maybe even normal teenage girl. I’m 14. But this is were it all started.
When I was little, I was always the “troubled” child. My parents would curse at me , call me a “retard” , “slut” “whore” all different types of names when I just was two years of age. It wasn’t only the names… my mom was a drunk and my dad wasn’t so much of a help either, she would hit me, with all sorts of things, whatever she could get her hands on. […]
Rag Doll
People come and go in life
but it still hurts when you walked away tonight
i never meant the words that i said
i should never have left so much unsaid
the words never left, the lips depart
and all i do is go back to start
you cannot pass go when time is to slow
the heart string attached to what is sold
i meant ever positive thing that i said
and negative is whats stuck in your head
takes months to build, and seconds to destroy
i am empty like a rag doll, a forgotten toy
chewed me up and sanded me down
this is where i put words left safe, unsound
i didn’t mean it, i […]
This is me and my x boyfriend. I met him at a party he was the first guy i was truely happy with. I love him so much i was willing to give up everything.. even my virginity. but we never made it that far. When he got a job he started to like another girl. Weeks past and i noticed he was distancing himself from me, one day i asked him ” what time do you get off tonight” and he snapped saying “why do […]
It’s no matter. Everything, nothing. Please somehow show me how to change myself, to make things better – because so far my efforts are merely in vain. My own mind teases me – “Oh hey, you’re good, you’re great, things are going to work now!”. Give it a few days, if that, back to: “Fuck!! I hate myself! I hate all this shit! I could give TWO FUCKING SHITS about EVERYTHING! I AM DONE!”. Release the beast, the demon, the real me from its temporary hiding place, or maybe cage. Too bad, so sad – it can’t stay there.
I really don’t know what to do […]