I completely lost it. I don’t know how to get up anymore, today i did it more as a mechanism, because people do that, they get up. My hands are shaking, I am terribly afraid of myself. I can’t control my actions anymore. It seems like another person lives inside me, controling my mind, giving a false perception of reality. I think i am insane, I don’t want to be and the thought of it makes me cry. People have so many expectations of me but i just wish i can tell them who i really am. And more than anything i wish they could […]
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Right Decision
Hello! I’m writing this in order to get some help, and be sure that i’ve made the right decision.
I wrote this to another person on another website:Â <<<Â I feel the same as you do/did “Every day I wake up feeling terrible! I don’t want to die,i just don’t want to live like this.” and i felt it since i was your age 17/18 and then i was dreaming about killing myself but i talked to others and i was to weak to take my own life so i said that i’ll wait, that things will get better, two years have passed and i had a big […]
I don’t want to die, but I don’t want to live either.
Maybe that’s not entirely true, sometimes I’d really like to die. Like the time I took twenty pills and stared up at the ceiling waiting for it all to be over. But something always pulls me back. Ten minutes into it, my little brother came in to comfort me. I had been upset after my mom had another one of her episodes and lashed out at me. He told me that she didn’t mean it and that he would be there for me. It was in that moment that I didn’t want to die […]
Hello all,
I have the urge to declare my sanity and justify my actions. I doubt that anyone will be convinced that this was the right decision. They are all too caught up in what they believe is sane or what they believe is “good” or “happy”. I believe it is my right to decide what I do with my life. It is my goddam decision! We all preach to the rest of the world about “freedom”. Well, how “free” are we really if society can’t accept someone’s decision to end their life? The word suicide is shunned and scorned. A person who commits such a […]
I once asked my friend what he thought about suicide.He told me “suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem”, he told me it was gutless and a cowardly thing to do.
I think it’s the bravest thing anybody could ever do. To end your life and welcome death and look him straight in the eye, i think it’s the bravest thing anybody could ever achieve.
I’ve thought about it, many times, I don’t think there is a person who hasn’t had the thought of ending it all cross their mind in their entire lifetime. I am new to this site but already it’s helping me, every time I look […]
Hello, I just discovered this forum tonight. I’ve been struggling with suicidal thoughts for years. For as long as I can remember, really. But recently, they’ve been stronger than ever. Since my mother committed suicide back in September, I’ve had an ascending urge to do myself in as well. It was all due to desperation at first. But at this time, oddly, I feel peaceful about it. Like I’m making the right decision. Or I would be. I am afraid to hurt the people I love. Just like the way my mother hurt me. Having experienced this pain, I would never wish it upon anyone […]
“I don’t know what to do. My life is empty. I’ve wasted too much time. I’m useless. I’m insignificant.
I wish I was strong enough to kill me.
Why am I not?
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
After all, it’s the best thing to do…”
That’s how my diary started today. That’s how, with some very tiny differences, my diary has started and gone on for too much time.
I’m tired. I just want to sleep. I just want everything to finish, right now.
Why do people who love living so much die all of a sudden?
I don’t like living. I never have.
The world is so full of people. And […]