So I’m 14, I know too young to be feeling this way. But I have no confidence I cant stand looking in the mirror I hate myself. I’ve been breaking down a lot, nothing but crying this isn’t the first time but its never been this bad. I literally have been having suicidal thoughts everyday, its gotten to the point to where I almost started crying in school today. I barely started cutting again. I had stopped in like November-ish of last year I think. But its been awhile and I started up again like in April I think. I’ve written so many suicide letters its ridiculous. […]
Tag:
Spell Check
I have friends . Family ect . I had a rough child hood but it made me the strong person I am today . I can handle abuse , problems, conflict . Or at least on the surface . I smoke about an eigth a day of weed to mello out and drink when I can’t smoke . I use to use other drugs till I realized I was only letting “them” win by making myself look like the dirtbag they made me sound like . So I stick to my pot and alcohol although I have a struggle everyday. I feel like I dot […]
been doing some journaling lately and got an urge.
SourceURL:file:///Users/Jesse/Documents/Writing/2-24-2012
2/4/12
Well, I’m trying something I figured I’d do on the way home.
Just got back from Dr. Markowitz and again was having discussions about doing things, how I don’t wanna do things, all the negative thoughts, all the incentive not to, how I wanna die all the time, and shit like that. Since I always seem to have a little shred of positivity after I come home from him, I decided on the train home that maybe I’d try writing down my thoughts, something he has suggested and has been suggested many times before, so here I am.
Everything […]