It’s like I’m destined to feel this desperate and guilty my whole life. Jesus please save me, help me, show me, do something to let me know you’re there and not just a story for us to feel good about. I want to meet you when I die, not a black void.
Tag:
us
I’m waiting and…
it’s summer but … I say this and I’m not sure if anyone care but maybe you can suggest me sth to do .
I’m waiting for someone and if she call me oh…I cannot even imagine but I’ll be the most happy human in the world now I am just praying and…
I’m sure God will help us and…
oh I am toooo excited sorry!
June Carter Cash and Johnny Cash sang Farside Banks of Jordan (copywright blah,blah blah) but it makes me think of you Jeff…
I believe my steps are growin’ wearier each day
Still I’ve got another journey on my mind
The lures of this old world have ceased to make me wanna stay
My one regret is leavin’ you behind
But if it proves to be His will that I am first to cross
And somehow I’ve a feelin’ it will be
When it comes your time to travel likewise, don’t feel lost
For I will be the first thing that you’ll […]
How many times did the sun shine, how many times did the wind howl over the desolate tundras, over the bleak immensity of the Siberian taigas, over the brown deserts where the Earth´s salt shines, over the high peaks capped with silver, over the shivering jungles, over the undulating forests of the tropics – day after day. Through infinite time, the scenery has changed in imperceptible features. Let us smile at the illusion of eternity that appears in these things, and while so many temporary aspects fade away, let us listen to the ancient hymn, the spectacular song of the wind, that has saluted so […]
Consciousness, the cruel joke played on us all by the universe. When I catch my reflection all I see is a talking ape that knows of its mortality and the meaningless of being. Death is the punch line and often I feel the joke is dragging on and leaving me wishing to just get there already.
I am ‘the thing’.
Evolve me. Clap- clap. Clap- clap.
From hell. Clap- clap. Clap.
Evolve me. Evolve me. Clap- clap. Clap-clap.
From hell. From hell! Clap- clap- clap!
From hell! From hell! Clap- clap- clap- clap- clap- clap.
Forever and ever. Always and forever.
My name is Nevermore.
I am ‘the thing’. Celestial Slowbro and Golduck.
Only eye-candy. Staryu and Starmie.
Let me be. Let me be. Take me. Pull me.
Oracle, I have monthly bounty.
Let us go, and grow plants and flowers, perhaps.
Let me go train like a fire pokemon. Never end rock pokemon.
Machamp is the champ, he can beat Mewtwo.
Remember when you were a kid and you did something you knew was going to earn you a trip to the woodshed? A lot of us kids when I was growing up had a place the old man would drag us to give us the “board” that was far enough out of the way that the whacks and screams wouldn’t make it back to your mother’s ears. That way the old man wouldn’t have to deal with her bitching about being to hard on you or risk getting the “It so upsets me when you do that” speech from her. It’s that feeling of impending […]
When I use the word “god” I’m not talking about any particular religious image. For lack of a better word, I’m using “god” to mean whatever force created and/or governs this universe. It could be a bearded dude on a throne, it could be a mathematical equation or it could be a random spark that started a fire. But whatever it is, I hate it.
I hate the rules and patterns of existence that we live by. Universal laws like “survival of the fittest”, “kill or be killed” and “consume others so that you may live” are the laws of all living organisms, whether we’re talking […]
I started cutting a year ago in March when it happened. I was having a sleepover with my two friends Kiaya and Amanda. We all slept in my bed which was big enough to fit all of us. I was in the middle. I woke up in the middle of the night to whispers from Kiaya. She was talking from the perspective of a guy towards me in a seductive way. I didn’t do anything about it because I wasn’t sure what was happening. That’s when she leaned in and kissed me when my eyes were closed. She stole my first kiss, but that was […]
hitting out of a leaf spiff.
the music cycles through the zodiac.
it seems at the end, we have lost.
only me. staring at the cat.
the bunny bit me, and I bled.
the purple sky turns the water red.
devil shines through the mind.
what is your color of black.
on to the next tract. what will be.
in the hands of faith.
the moon and the night.
in darkness. the story of the lost knight.
death. a horsemen.
seems like we hold a chain, all of us.
exiled from the mystical realm.
i am losing.
It’s been 3 years since we said goodbye. He wanted it to last, I wanted it to end. I knew I broke his heart, but I had to do it. I was nearing my end, and I had to end us before I ended myself.
I didn’t tell him that reason though, I told him that I was too immature for him. He deserved someone on his level, a smarter person, someone unbroken. I wasn’t ready to take on the responsibility of someone else’s feelings.
I removed him from facebook, made my profile extremely private, and made my last status.
The rope wasn’t strong enough.
He’s always been in the […]
What options for death really are there for profound disabled like myself? I can’t get a gun, can’t get in a car and go somewhere, and hanging never fails to fail. The only thing I was suggested by “professionals” was, if you want to die, you can, you just have to stop eating and drinking completely. Number one, what an inhumane way to go! I cannot imagine depriving myself of water until I am dead. That is barbaric. Number two, most of us disabled are in the care of family members who would force feed us. So this is clearly not an option. Also most […]
We can be lonely without being alone
Because we yearn for a comfort that
Can gives us the satisfaction that we need
We can be lonely without being alone
Because even though we are surrounded
By love and comfort; in the end it is not what we want
We can be lonely without being alone
Because friends will try to love us
But we only want a certain kind of love
We can be lonely without being alone
Because some love that people give us
Is not the love we want to receive
We can be lonely without being alone
Because sometimes we need one person
But that person […]
Hey there baby, you looking fine
again tonight like always
I’m so bad with these corny lines
but you never judge me
instead you stand far away and let
your vertiginous glory pluck at my nerves
ready to catch me when I remove
80 feet of concrete between us
Remember when we first met?
I was so young then and you were the same
soft shade of aquamarine that I feel
flling my nostrils and bluring my sight
Your presence a promise of an eternal
unbearable comfort hugging me tight
How much has changed since then?
Nothing at all, as you of course know
except that your […]
Simply put, I think it’s all crap. Not the things, good and bad, that have happened in my life thus far. Heavens no, that won’t do at all. What’s crap is that people sincerely believe that I should be “happy” that I’m alive. I was given a life (that I never asked for, by the way), and I now it’s apparently mandatory for me to be thankful for that fact. I’m not here to blame my parents for being arrogant pricks and assuming that the child they created would be happy with this “gift of life” that he never asked to receive. Blaming others for […]
I know exactly what’s going to happen between us tomorrow, yet I don’t have the willpower to stop it anymore. I’ve had it.
Just let me die now >:( I hate the way my brain works.
Hello!
I’m starting a small skype chat group for us to talk to each other and comment about our day. It’d be a comfortable way to make some new friends.
Comment here if you’d like to participate. I will email you my skype name and ask that you friend add me on skype. You will be added to the group within a few days!
… registered here. So far hasn’t been so bad other than that cluster fuck that caused me to register in the first place. See, we can all be kind to each other when we want to. Maybe, maybe it’s just my inability to get pissed off anymore that I wonder why others get so mad over silly things so easily. But I do appreciate the hospitality you all have shown me since I announced my pressence here on SP. Good Vibrations to you all, and may you be able to wade through the shit in your lives and travel the extreme dissonance you need to trek through to have a better life. […]
Why do older people consider themselves wiser and smarter?
They really think that experience defines someone.They say things like : “Poor you! you’re so young.You don’t know what life is.”.It’s really annoying.I’m really sure one can find answers about life through many ways.I didn’t fall in love, I didn’t get married, I didn’t get my own house, I didn’t have sex, I didn’t get my own driver license, I’m not a father or grandfather, I didn’t have a career, I didn’t found true happiness.So what? think I’m upset because I didn’t do everything or good part of the things I could have done or still […]
We are champions. All of us in our predicaments. Nobody will ever tell us that because no one else  can ever truly understand what it is we go through. I   I just wanted to say from one suicidal person to another.
I love you and i would hug the crap out of you if you were near.
You are my Hero.
And i wish you luck on whatever happens next.