Were that I could curl against
that tipping point
an’ place my breast
my sternum rent against its edge
press down where guilty muscle’s spent
and worn from fighting blackened webs
That wrap around, the charred scent sweet,
my heartbeat wearing, growing […]
Tag:
weeping
Last night I lost control over my feelings. Couldn’t stop crying. My family went out so I stayed home alone. I turned off all my bedroom lights and went and sat in my closest. Started crying; weeping. I was thinking about cutting again. I was saying to myself “You promised. Don’t break the promises you made.”
Although I promised, I turned on the closet light and looked for the blades (2). As I was holding them in my hands I kept thinking of my friends and the promises I made.
After a while holding them, it was hard but I put them back and got up. […]
Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
Who told me time would ease me of my pain!
I miss [her] in the weeping of rain;
I want [her] at the shrinking of the tide;
The old snows melt from every mountain-side,
And last year’s leaves are smoke in every lane;
But last year’s bitter loving must remain
Heaped on my heart, and my old thoughts abide.
There are a hundred places where I fear
To go, — so with [her] memory they brim.
And entering with relief some quiet place
Where never fell his foot or shone his face
I say, “There is no memory of [her] here!”
And so stand stricken, so remembering [her].
-Edna St. […]
So. Its my 20th birthday, yet life isn’t anymore exciting. I tried everything; moving away, moving back, sex, drugs, its all not working. I took the nursing program so my mom would just get off my back. Drew, my boyfriend and I moved into the basment at dads. Its been great for the first few months, but everything is getting so boring and life is becoming so repetetive. Yesturday is clashing with today, and no doubt tomorrow. Well I guess its time to go out, I’m almost 20.
I meet up with Sam and Sie, and I try my most authetic smile, because though they’re […]