So, I did start ‘Tis, by F. McCourt – not as captivating as Angela’s Ashes, though certainly worth the read… Poor Irish boy trying to make his way in America – quite the writer; I like his style…
Quite irresolute right now – why go on living ? I think I rather prefer death – perhaps going to sleep for all eternity, or ‘wake up’ in a state in which I’m not compelled to contemplate not existing… This life – is all a mess …
I really don’t like my neighbours – I almost called the guy out… Was gonna be some fighting there was… But I held back… When you’re contemplating suicide, hard to want to fight even; if I get irritated a little more though, a fight there’s gonna be…
…
Someone mentions ‘LMS’ and I see R. W. on TV – a show he was on maybe a year or so ago… This site – I wonder … someone else also noted that it can be rather “spooky” – maybe it *is* because this is a (I can’t remember what that other guy said) sort of a ‘gateway’ of sorts between this life and whatever awaits beyond this, at least for many a soul that finds their way here… Hmm…
I actually think I’m rather close to ‘doing the deed’ – don’t see my health improving to a level that would facilitate a life with any sort o’ quality, and likely to end in …well… a rather shitty manner; and money – f*** !! … that’s all…
Okay, old news now, but, what a match by Murray (!!) … on a day I’m talking about telepathy an’ stuff – go figure … would never have imagined – being this exhausted must be similar to being like totally drunk – closest I got to that was when I turned 21 (first alcoholic beverage, not much thereafter…)… And, yeah, I hold no ‘beliefs’ on what awaits after/beyond this (current) existence… Prefer to work with what I see, try to understand the mechanisms / processes through which I, and everything else, exist and function, and not conjure up fantasies – if I can’t explain something – well, I can’t … Though perhaps one needs some ‘vague’ (can’t find a better word) ‘belief(s)’ to sorta keep one ‘together’ sometimes…
I finished ‘Tis… McCourt’s mother’s last years and death was truly sad… As I was reading, my own mother was sitting across from me, looking old and …well… frail, really… and I wondered how much longer she had left; and, for a moment I considered what me committing suicide would mean for her (okay, have thought about it previously) – just don’t know if I can hold out much longer… There’s the thought also that they (parents) also really messed up, but ’tis no place o’ mine to judge (right?) … But, I have indeed sacrificed on my part, and just don’t see the point trying to continue (in suffering even)… Just need this all to end !! …
I’m not sure about reading Tolle’s ‘A New Earth’ – borrowed it and not feeling like reading it… I did skim through it previously – fairly well-written; just, something about Tolle not quite sitting well with me (right now)…
Wish I had more energy; sometimes it’s as if my physiological processes have just about shut down; kinda wish everything would just shut down entirely, really, and not prolong all of this – I’m tired…
When the day is long and the night, the night
is yours alone,
When you’re sure you’ve had enough of this life,
well hang on
Don’t let yourself go,
’cause everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes
Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it’s time to sing along
When your day is night alone, (hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go, (hold on)
When you think you’ve had too much of this life,
well hang on
‘Cause everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts. Don’t throw your hand. Oh, no.
Don’t throw your hand
If you feel like you’re alone, no, no, no, you are not alone
If you’re on your own in this life,
the days and nights are long,
When you think you’ve had too much of this life to hang on
Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
Everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts. You are not alone
~ R.E.M.
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I’m having one of the lousiest days of my life… I’m getting closer to going through with it… Yeah, I’m feeling kinda alone right now (even though I’m not) …
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I had an argument with my mother today – got a lot of stuff out… Never a good thing arguing with your rather old mother… Just got to move on, get on with it; needed to though … Man, not a lot of things more awkward in this life… I just never looked at where I was at for a lot of my life, rather just tried to ensure that my family’s lives were (somewhat) okay… Now, I’m all f’ed up… Siblings are like, “hey, what did you do for us?”…
I don’t know… I’m tired…
I’m feeling like seriously f’ed up… Seems that as I get closer to feeling like I can (and should) get this over with, I’m starting to really think about my dad… I’ve had a lot of guilt over not being able to really help him – I tried a bit, just was too ‘broken’, things such a mess… To see him die the way he did – excruciating… Not being able to process it all and express myself – devastating… F*** !! … I’m a (bigger) mess, today – need this to f****n’ end…
Djokovic – Murray final — this could be rather enthralling or a bit of a disappointment…
I read like 2 pages of Tolle’s ‘A New Earth’, and decided that I can’t really accept his perspective on things (yes, I do accept some -perhaps a lot- of what he generally has to say, but there’s something ‘amiss’ (?)…) so, not comfortable reading the book…
Quiet weekend… would have went out, but…
If only I could get physically stronger, and soon (!!) …
Seen quite a few new people coming on SP this week, posting and commenting; I wonder how many people just read/’listen’ in, without ever posting/commenting…
I’m finding it quite ‘tedious’ – irritating even – interacting with people in general – we’re rather compelled to interact to survive (well, just about all of us; some less so)… This life – is all a mess (!!) … Anyway…
Got to fight another fight – I gotta run another night,
Get it out – check it out,
I’m on my way and it don’t feel right
I gotta get me back – I can’t be beat and that’s a fact
It’s OK – I’ll find a way
You ain’t gonna take me down no way
Don’t judge a thing until you know what’s inside it
Don’t push me – I’ll fight it
Never gonna give in – never gonna give it up no
If you can’t catch a wave then you’re never gonna ride it
You can’t come uninvited
Never gonna give in – never gonna give it up no
You can’t take me I’m free
Why did it all go wrong? – I wanna know what’s goin’on
And what’s this holding me?
I’m not where I’m supposed to be
I gotta fight another fight
I gotta fight with all my might
I’m getting out, so check it out
Ya – you’re in my way
So you better watch out
She calls out to the man on the street
“Sir, can you help me?
It’s cold and I’ve nowhere to sleep
Is there somewhere you can tell me?”
He walks on, doesn’t look back
He pretends he can’t hear her
He starts to whistle as he crosses the street
She’s embarrassed to be there
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day for
For you and me in paradise
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it
She calls out to the man on the street
He can see she’s been cryin’
She’s got blisters on the soles of her feet
She can’t walk but she’s tryin’
Oh, just think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
Oh Lord, is there nothing more anybody can do?
Oh Lord, there must be something you can say
You can tell by the lines on her face
You can see that she’s been there
Probably been moved on from every place
‘Cause she didn’t fit in there
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me in paradise
In paradise
.
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~P.C. (Another Day in Paradise)
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… Wish I had musical talent … This life – is all a mess…
My body is betraying me… or is my subconscious ‘betraying’ me — is there a distinction (?); is there a seperation (?)… All one and the same (?)… What can I be without my body ?? *’My’* & *’body’* — self-awareness (?) degenerating to being lost, confused, f’ed-up …
F*** – ’tis the end result that matters, right (?) – which is that I’m just messed up – ‘mentally’, ‘physically’… My being in tatters, my despair resounding through all the earth; a spectacle for all to see – f*** it – my attempt at poetry … F*** – ‘s all a mess…
.
.
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out spaces, worn out places
Bright and early with the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
And the tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
And my head, I want to drown my sorrows
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny and I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
And I find it hard to tell you and I find it hard to take
When people run in circles, it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
I went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher, tell me what’s my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kind of funny and I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
And I find it hard to tell you and I find it hard to take
When people run in circles, it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world, mad world, mad world
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I go to sleep for a few hours and Andy Murray pretty much thrashes Novak Djokovic to win Wimbledon – ‘s a mad world … A final with no Roger Federer, no Nadal – yeah, seasons pass, times change, the world goes on — new faces – pretty much the same crap …
Life :-: consciousness :-: self-awareness … ‘s all a mess …
I’m feeling like crap – it’s been a really long time since I’ve felt good; doesn’t look like changing anytime soon – I dunno…
People living, people dying – too many of us come here when, and into circumstances, we shouldn’t have… A sperm and an egg (my biology’s a bit shabby) – that’s about it, right (?)… And, hey presto, a human (comes into existence and) has to enter this world … Oi, ’tis a mess …
She calls out to the man on the street
“Sir, can you help me?
It’s cold and I’ve nowhere to sleep
Is there somewhere you can tell me?”
He walks on, doesn’t look back
He pretends he can’t hear her
He starts to whistle as he crosses the street
She’s embarrassed to be there
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day for
For you and me in paradise
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it
She calls out to the man on the street
He can see she’s been cryin’
She’s got blisters on the soles of her feet
She can’t walk but she’s tryin’
Oh, just think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
Oh Lord, is there nothing more anybody can do?
Oh Lord, there must be something you can say
You can tell by the lines on her face
You can see that she’s been there
Probably been moved on from every place
‘Cause she didn’t fit in there
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me in paradise
In paradise
.
Just think about it …
.
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Woke up and this song is playing in my head … so, there it is (again)…
… Contradictions abound … Silly ‘games’ () as well … Shitty consequence of it is that the rather young / vulnerable are likely to be negatively impacted …
Ah, well … ‘s all a mess …
Anyway, I watched a bit of ‘Rocky’ when I was younger (and more of a mess ??); so …
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“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you’re hit. It’s about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain’t you! You’re better than that!” – Rocky Balboa …
Context/circumstances to be considered, but, good really …
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Still, ‘s a mess …
I can’t even verbalize basic stuff, thus [I’m] isolating to a large extent… undergoing physical distress over a prolonged period with occasional relief does make one rather more ‘cognizant’ of the impact of physical distress on one’s mental (/psychological) state/functioning…
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The mechanism/psychological ‘underpinnings’ of (religious -and otherwise general-) belief(s)… complex (?), simple (?)… a mess…
Salt mixed in with coconut powder – a bit of vomiting there was… someone on here was rather poetic when vomiting… not I… that would have been something positive, no?
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Yeah, ‘s a mess…
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I’m finally starting to ‘get to grips’ with the sexual abuse I went through during my early childhood (3-11); it has been a rather excruciating process; the ‘shackles’ are being ‘broken’, though…
There are other issues to be tended to, which do have the potential to make the path going forward a bit more difficult, but, psychologically, I’m doing better… so, there’s ’cause’ to be ‘hopeful’…
Always ensure that salt and coconut powder are kept well apart… else, there’s gonna be quite the mess…
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Do I still prefer oblivion (??) – well, actually, yeah…
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‘Quotes’ to perhaps ponder on:
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Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.
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Do not think of knocking out another person’s brains because he differs in opinion from you. It would be as rational to knock yourself on the head because you differ from yourself ten years ago.
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The only thing more dangerous than ignorance is arrogance.
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… So as to [go some way in] dissolving the messy… to avoid a mess… yeah, *’tis* quite the mess …
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Should I ‘dissolve’ my neighbours (?) … *pondering* …
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Another ‘quote’:
“Our theories of the eternal are as valuable as are those which a chick which has not broken its way through its shell might form of the outside world.”
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– Accept that certain questions should be set aside (?) … pragmatic (?) – okay …
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It irritated me to hear so many say that this ‘life’ is simply an ‘illusion’… seems somewhat easy for the ‘mind’ to get ‘lost’, if not ‘grounded’ by, well, ‘life’ itself – the actual, real, living of it… Yeah, ‘illusory’ (/flawed) ‘constructs, perhaps, ‘developed’ in (/through) the living of it, but ‘it’ – life – my individual life, is no ‘illusion’… In attempting to get to (and perhaps even being ‘aware’ of) ‘source’, some have developed rather ‘incongruent’ constructs… Appreciating the ‘connectedness’ /’common base’ we live through – ‘source’ – is one thing (good), but, unfortunately, another ‘illusion’ can be ‘created’…
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“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consist of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life” – Albert Camus
Thanks, Duke of Marmalade.
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A bit more of Camus then:
“I continue to believe that this world has no ultimate meaning. But I know that something in it has a meaning and that is man, because he is the only creature to insist on having one.”
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“I said that the world is absurd, but I was too hasty. This world in itself is not reasonable, that is all that can be said. But what is absurd is the confrontation of this irrational and the wild longing for clarity whose call echoes in the human heart.”
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Yeah, ‘s really a mess…
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[‘triggering’ …]
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‘Sex’ with a 3-year-old child …
What is ‘sex’ (?)… *Primarily* (purpose being) a means of ‘procreation’ (*) [yes, two people expressing their love/desire for (/biopsychological (/biopsychosocial) ‘drive’ toward) each other…] … Two people coming together to engage in an act that (*) has the potential (conditions…) to result in another human being [coming into (this) existence (/world)]…
How do you engage in such an act in a violent (sadistic, even) manner…
How do you use a _child_ ‘sexually’ (?)… How do you have sex with – rape – a 3-year-old child — a human being with no foundation (/construct) by which to process / have an understanding, even, of what is being done to their body (?)… How can things be so messed-up that a 3-year-old boy is raped ???
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I guess someone may be being raped (a child, perhaps) as I write this, even…
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Tired …
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Because children grow up, we think a child’s purpose is to grow up. But a child’s purpose is to be a child. Nature doesn’t disdain what lives only for a day. It pours the whole of itself into the each moment. We don’t value the lily less for not being made of flint and built to last. Life’s bounty is in its flow, later is too late. Where is the song when it’s been sung? The dance when it’s been danced? It’s only we humans who want to own the future, too. We persuade ourselves that the universe is modestly employed in unfolding our destination. We note the haphazard chaos of history by the day, by the hour, but there is something wrong with the picture. Where is the unity, the meaning, of nature’s highest creation? Surely those millions of little streams of accident and wilfulness have their correction in the vast underground river which, without a doubt, is carrying us to the place where we’re expected! But there is no such place, that’s why it’s called utopia. The death of a child has no more meaning than the death of armies, of nations. Was the child happy while he lived? That is a proper question, the only question. If we can’t arrange our own happiness, it’s a conceit beyond vulgarity to arrange the happiness of those who come after us.
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~ T. Stoppard
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… Hmm …
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As soon as you look at the world through an ideology, you are finished. No reality fits an ideology. Life is beyond that. That is why people are always searching for a meaning to life. Meaning is only found when you go beyond meaning. Life only makes sense when you perceive it as mystery and it makes no sense to the conceptualizing mind.
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~ A. de Mello
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It’s like… I need gummi-berry juice or something …
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Dashing and daring,
Courageous and caring,
Faithful and friendly,
With stories to share.
All through the forest,
They sing out in chorus,
Marching along,
As their song fills the air.
Gummi Bears!!
Bouncing here and there and everywhere.
High adventure that’s beyond compare.
They are the Gummi Bears…
Magic and mystery,
Are part of their history,
Along with the secret,
Of gummiberry juice.
Their legend is growing,
They take pride in knowing,
They’ll fight for what’s right,
In whatever they do.
Gummi Bears!!
Bouncing here and there and everywhere.
High adventure that’s beyond compare.
They are the Gummi Bears.
They are the Gummi Bears!!
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Gummi Bears helped me get through some tough times growing up – okay ?
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I wish I were a Gummi Bear !
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35 comments
So, I did start ‘Tis, by F. McCourt – not as captivating as Angela’s Ashes, though certainly worth the read… Poor Irish boy trying to make his way in America – quite the writer; I like his style…
Quite irresolute right now – why go on living ? I think I rather prefer death – perhaps going to sleep for all eternity, or ‘wake up’ in a state in which I’m not compelled to contemplate not existing… This life – is all a mess …
I really don’t like my neighbours – I almost called the guy out… Was gonna be some fighting there was… But I held back… When you’re contemplating suicide, hard to want to fight even; if I get irritated a little more though, a fight there’s gonna be…
…
Someone mentions ‘LMS’ and I see R. W. on TV – a show he was on maybe a year or so ago… This site – I wonder … someone else also noted that it can be rather “spooky” – maybe it *is* because this is a (I can’t remember what that other guy said) sort of a ‘gateway’ of sorts between this life and whatever awaits beyond this, at least for many a soul that finds their way here… Hmm…
I actually think I’m rather close to ‘doing the deed’ – don’t see my health improving to a level that would facilitate a life with any sort o’ quality, and likely to end in …well… a rather shitty manner; and money – f*** !! … that’s all…
Okay, old news now, but, what a match by Murray (!!) … on a day I’m talking about telepathy an’ stuff – go figure … would never have imagined – being this exhausted must be similar to being like totally drunk – closest I got to that was when I turned 21 (first alcoholic beverage, not much thereafter…)… And, yeah, I hold no ‘beliefs’ on what awaits after/beyond this (current) existence… Prefer to work with what I see, try to understand the mechanisms / processes through which I, and everything else, exist and function, and not conjure up fantasies – if I can’t explain something – well, I can’t … Though perhaps one needs some ‘vague’ (can’t find a better word) ‘belief(s)’ to sorta keep one ‘together’ sometimes…
I finished ‘Tis… McCourt’s mother’s last years and death was truly sad… As I was reading, my own mother was sitting across from me, looking old and …well… frail, really… and I wondered how much longer she had left; and, for a moment I considered what me committing suicide would mean for her (okay, have thought about it previously) – just don’t know if I can hold out much longer… There’s the thought also that they (parents) also really messed up, but ’tis no place o’ mine to judge (right?) … But, I have indeed sacrificed on my part, and just don’t see the point trying to continue (in suffering even)… Just need this all to end !! …
I’m not sure about reading Tolle’s ‘A New Earth’ – borrowed it and not feeling like reading it… I did skim through it previously – fairly well-written; just, something about Tolle not quite sitting well with me (right now)…
Wish I had more energy; sometimes it’s as if my physiological processes have just about shut down; kinda wish everything would just shut down entirely, really, and not prolong all of this – I’m tired…
When the day is long and the night, the night
is yours alone,
When you’re sure you’ve had enough of this life,
well hang on
Don’t let yourself go,
’cause everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes
Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it’s time to sing along
When your day is night alone, (hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go, (hold on)
When you think you’ve had too much of this life,
well hang on
‘Cause everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts. Don’t throw your hand. Oh, no.
Don’t throw your hand
If you feel like you’re alone, no, no, no, you are not alone
If you’re on your own in this life,
the days and nights are long,
When you think you’ve had too much of this life to hang on
Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
Everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts. You are not alone
~ R.E.M.
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I’m having one of the lousiest days of my life… I’m getting closer to going through with it… Yeah, I’m feeling kinda alone right now (even though I’m not) …
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I had an argument with my mother today – got a lot of stuff out… Never a good thing arguing with your rather old mother… Just got to move on, get on with it; needed to though … Man, not a lot of things more awkward in this life… I just never looked at where I was at for a lot of my life, rather just tried to ensure that my family’s lives were (somewhat) okay… Now, I’m all f’ed up… Siblings are like, “hey, what did you do for us?”…
I don’t know… I’m tired…
Lisicki v Bartoli – should be good…
Del Potro proving quite a battle for Djokovic…
I’m feeling like seriously f’ed up… Seems that as I get closer to feeling like I can (and should) get this over with, I’m starting to really think about my dad… I’ve had a lot of guilt over not being able to really help him – I tried a bit, just was too ‘broken’, things such a mess… To see him die the way he did – excruciating… Not being able to process it all and express myself – devastating… F*** !! … I’m a (bigger) mess, today – need this to f****n’ end…
Djokovic – Murray final — this could be rather enthralling or a bit of a disappointment…
Man, I’m tired…
I read like 2 pages of Tolle’s ‘A New Earth’, and decided that I can’t really accept his perspective on things (yes, I do accept some -perhaps a lot- of what he generally has to say, but there’s something ‘amiss’ (?)…) so, not comfortable reading the book…
Quiet weekend… would have went out, but…
If only I could get physically stronger, and soon (!!) …
Seen quite a few new people coming on SP this week, posting and commenting; I wonder how many people just read/’listen’ in, without ever posting/commenting…
I’m finding it quite ‘tedious’ – irritating even – interacting with people in general – we’re rather compelled to interact to survive (well, just about all of us; some less so)… This life – is all a mess (!!) … Anyway…
You can’t take me, yeah!
Got to fight another fight – I gotta run another night,
Get it out – check it out,
I’m on my way and it don’t feel right
I gotta get me back – I can’t be beat and that’s a fact
It’s OK – I’ll find a way
You ain’t gonna take me down no way
Don’t judge a thing until you know what’s inside it
Don’t push me – I’ll fight it
Never gonna give in – never gonna give it up no
If you can’t catch a wave then you’re never gonna ride it
You can’t come uninvited
Never gonna give in – never gonna give it up no
You can’t take me I’m free
Why did it all go wrong? – I wanna know what’s goin’on
And what’s this holding me?
I’m not where I’m supposed to be
I gotta fight another fight
I gotta fight with all my might
I’m getting out, so check it out
Ya – you’re in my way
So you better watch out
– B. A. (Spirit…)
She calls out to the man on the street
“Sir, can you help me?
It’s cold and I’ve nowhere to sleep
Is there somewhere you can tell me?”
He walks on, doesn’t look back
He pretends he can’t hear her
He starts to whistle as he crosses the street
She’s embarrassed to be there
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day for
For you and me in paradise
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it
She calls out to the man on the street
He can see she’s been cryin’
She’s got blisters on the soles of her feet
She can’t walk but she’s tryin’
Oh, just think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
Oh Lord, is there nothing more anybody can do?
Oh Lord, there must be something you can say
You can tell by the lines on her face
You can see that she’s been there
Probably been moved on from every place
‘Cause she didn’t fit in there
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me in paradise
In paradise
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~P.C. (Another Day in Paradise)
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… Wish I had musical talent … This life – is all a mess…
My body is betraying me… or is my subconscious ‘betraying’ me — is there a distinction (?); is there a seperation (?)… All one and the same (?)… What can I be without my body ?? *’My’* & *’body’* — self-awareness (?) degenerating to being lost, confused, f’ed-up …
F*** – ’tis the end result that matters, right (?) – which is that I’m just messed up – ‘mentally’, ‘physically’… My being in tatters, my despair resounding through all the earth; a spectacle for all to see – f*** it – my attempt at poetry … F*** – ‘s all a mess…
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All around me are familiar faces
Worn out spaces, worn out places
Bright and early with the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
And the tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
And my head, I want to drown my sorrows
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny and I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
And I find it hard to tell you and I find it hard to take
When people run in circles, it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
I went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher, tell me what’s my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kind of funny and I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
And I find it hard to tell you and I find it hard to take
When people run in circles, it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world, mad world, mad world
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… ‘s all a mess …
I go to sleep for a few hours and Andy Murray pretty much thrashes Novak Djokovic to win Wimbledon – ‘s a mad world … A final with no Roger Federer, no Nadal – yeah, seasons pass, times change, the world goes on — new faces – pretty much the same crap …
Life :-: consciousness :-: self-awareness … ‘s all a mess …
I’m feeling like crap – it’s been a really long time since I’ve felt good; doesn’t look like changing anytime soon – I dunno…
People living, people dying – too many of us come here when, and into circumstances, we shouldn’t have… A sperm and an egg (my biology’s a bit shabby) – that’s about it, right (?)… And, hey presto, a human (comes into existence and) has to enter this world … Oi, ’tis a mess …
I agree ….My happiest time was the day before I existed
^ Yeah; just, I don’t seem to have any recollection of that “day” …
Oh well… All the best, @enditall…
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… ‘s all a mess …
She calls out to the man on the street
“Sir, can you help me?
It’s cold and I’ve nowhere to sleep
Is there somewhere you can tell me?”
He walks on, doesn’t look back
He pretends he can’t hear her
He starts to whistle as he crosses the street
She’s embarrassed to be there
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day for
For you and me in paradise
Oh, think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it
She calls out to the man on the street
He can see she’s been cryin’
She’s got blisters on the soles of her feet
She can’t walk but she’s tryin’
Oh, just think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
Oh Lord, is there nothing more anybody can do?
Oh Lord, there must be something you can say
You can tell by the lines on her face
You can see that she’s been there
Probably been moved on from every place
‘Cause she didn’t fit in there
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
Oh, yes think twice, it’s just another day
For you, you and me in paradise
Just think about it, just think about it
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me in paradise
It’s just another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me
It’s another day
For you and me in paradise
In paradise
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Just think about it …
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Woke up and this song is playing in my head … so, there it is (again)…
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Another day…
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Yeah, ‘s a mess…
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… Contradictions abound … Silly ‘games’ () as well … Shitty consequence of it is that the rather young / vulnerable are likely to be negatively impacted …
Ah, well … ‘s all a mess …
Anyway, I watched a bit of ‘Rocky’ when I was younger (and more of a mess ??); so …
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“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you’re hit. It’s about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain’t you! You’re better than that!” – Rocky Balboa …
Context/circumstances to be considered, but, good really …
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Still, ‘s a mess …
Exhausted…
I can’t even verbalize basic stuff, thus [I’m] isolating to a large extent… undergoing physical distress over a prolonged period with occasional relief does make one rather more ‘cognizant’ of the impact of physical distress on one’s mental (/psychological) state/functioning…
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The mechanism/psychological ‘underpinnings’ of (religious -and otherwise general-) belief(s)… complex (?), simple (?)… a mess…
Salt mixed in with coconut powder – a bit of vomiting there was… someone on here was rather poetic when vomiting… not I… that would have been something positive, no?
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Yeah, ‘s a mess…
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*Restored…
I’m finally starting to ‘get to grips’ with the sexual abuse I went through during my early childhood (3-11); it has been a rather excruciating process; the ‘shackles’ are being ‘broken’, though…
There are other issues to be tended to, which do have the potential to make the path going forward a bit more difficult, but, psychologically, I’m doing better… so, there’s ’cause’ to be ‘hopeful’…
Always ensure that salt and coconut powder are kept well apart… else, there’s gonna be quite the mess…
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Do I still prefer oblivion (??) – well, actually, yeah…
Heck, still…’s a mess…
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‘Quotes’ to perhaps ponder on:
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Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.
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Do not think of knocking out another person’s brains because he differs in opinion from you. It would be as rational to knock yourself on the head because you differ from yourself ten years ago.
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The only thing more dangerous than ignorance is arrogance.
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… So as to [go some way in] dissolving the messy… to avoid a mess… yeah, *’tis* quite the mess …
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Should I ‘dissolve’ my neighbours (?) … *pondering* …
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Another ‘quote’:
“Our theories of the eternal are as valuable as are those which a chick which has not broken its way through its shell might form of the outside world.”
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– Accept that certain questions should be set aside (?) … pragmatic (?) – okay …
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It irritated me to hear so many say that this ‘life’ is simply an ‘illusion’… seems somewhat easy for the ‘mind’ to get ‘lost’, if not ‘grounded’ by, well, ‘life’ itself – the actual, real, living of it… Yeah, ‘illusory’ (/flawed) ‘constructs, perhaps, ‘developed’ in (/through) the living of it, but ‘it’ – life – my individual life, is no ‘illusion’… In attempting to get to (and perhaps even being ‘aware’ of) ‘source’, some have developed rather ‘incongruent’ constructs… Appreciating the ‘connectedness’ /’common base’ we live through – ‘source’ – is one thing (good), but, unfortunately, another ‘illusion’ can be ‘created’…
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It’s late…
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Psychological prisons… key to freedom – awareness… does take some time to ‘forge’ though…
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This quote seems appropriate for your post.
“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consist of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life” – Albert Camus
Thanks, Duke of Marmalade.
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A bit more of Camus then:
“I continue to believe that this world has no ultimate meaning. But I know that something in it has a meaning and that is man, because he is the only creature to insist on having one.”
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“I said that the world is absurd, but I was too hasty. This world in itself is not reasonable, that is all that can be said. But what is absurd is the confrontation of this irrational and the wild longing for clarity whose call echoes in the human heart.”
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Yeah, ‘s really a mess…
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I’m really struggling cognitively. I know my body’s f’ed up; every medical test/analysis indicates otherwise though – go f****n’ figure…
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[‘triggering’ …]
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‘Sex’ with a 3-year-old child …
What is ‘sex’ (?)… *Primarily* (purpose being) a means of ‘procreation’ (*) [yes, two people expressing their love/desire for (/biopsychological (/biopsychosocial) ‘drive’ toward) each other…] … Two people coming together to engage in an act that (*) has the potential (conditions…) to result in another human being [coming into (this) existence (/world)]…
How do you engage in such an act in a violent (sadistic, even) manner…
How do you use a _child_ ‘sexually’ (?)… How do you have sex with – rape – a 3-year-old child — a human being with no foundation (/construct) by which to process / have an understanding, even, of what is being done to their body (?)… How can things be so messed-up that a 3-year-old boy is raped ???
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I guess someone may be being raped (a child, perhaps) as I write this, even…
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Tired …
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Life ‘lives’ us ~ life ‘lives’ through us ~ we ‘live’ [life] … What does that mean ?? …
Why do we suffer ??
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Because children grow up, we think a child’s purpose is to grow up. But a child’s purpose is to be a child. Nature doesn’t disdain what lives only for a day. It pours the whole of itself into the each moment. We don’t value the lily less for not being made of flint and built to last. Life’s bounty is in its flow, later is too late. Where is the song when it’s been sung? The dance when it’s been danced? It’s only we humans who want to own the future, too. We persuade ourselves that the universe is modestly employed in unfolding our destination. We note the haphazard chaos of history by the day, by the hour, but there is something wrong with the picture. Where is the unity, the meaning, of nature’s highest creation? Surely those millions of little streams of accident and wilfulness have their correction in the vast underground river which, without a doubt, is carrying us to the place where we’re expected! But there is no such place, that’s why it’s called utopia. The death of a child has no more meaning than the death of armies, of nations. Was the child happy while he lived? That is a proper question, the only question. If we can’t arrange our own happiness, it’s a conceit beyond vulgarity to arrange the happiness of those who come after us.
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~ T. Stoppard
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… Hmm …
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As soon as you look at the world through an ideology, you are finished. No reality fits an ideology. Life is beyond that. That is why people are always searching for a meaning to life. Meaning is only found when you go beyond meaning. Life only makes sense when you perceive it as mystery and it makes no sense to the conceptualizing mind.
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~ A. de Mello
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It’s like… I need gummi-berry juice or something …
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Dashing and daring,
Courageous and caring,
Faithful and friendly,
With stories to share.
All through the forest,
They sing out in chorus,
Marching along,
As their song fills the air.
Gummi Bears!!
Bouncing here and there and everywhere.
High adventure that’s beyond compare.
They are the Gummi Bears…
Magic and mystery,
Are part of their history,
Along with the secret,
Of gummiberry juice.
Their legend is growing,
They take pride in knowing,
They’ll fight for what’s right,
In whatever they do.
Gummi Bears!!
Bouncing here and there and everywhere.
High adventure that’s beyond compare.
They are the Gummi Bears.
They are the Gummi Bears!!
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Gummi Bears helped me get through some tough times growing up – okay ?
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I wish I were a Gummi Bear !
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Father, we thank thee,
For the night,
And (for) the present morning light
For rest and food,
And loving care,
And all that makes the world so fair
Help us to do the things we should,
To be to others kind and good,
In all we do, in all we say,
To grow more loving every day
Amen.
…
Our daily morning prayer while at primary school – was just thinking about it…
Yeah…
A mess…
“It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.”
I’m just… really… tired.
Yeah…