head

ive always since i was little just seemed so out of touch with reality. its like i see things that people dont. like my eyes are really fucked up, it seems like everything is a matteress. my head always feels like its going to drop off. i feel like im in a lava lamp. its kinda fun on some days, like if im listening to the beatles or pink floyd and i feel sort of high, but it makes the low days even lower. the low days are hell. ive had my eyes checked a million and one times. i have to see a strange women who always writes on her notebook whenever i open my mouth. heaps of people i thought were my friends say to me “i give up on you” i am really just to different, to weird, to fucked up. i tried to kill myself once, it was beautiful the way the blood swirled and splatterd around the bath, it was like i was in a piece of art.