I’m new to this forum, but I came here because I’m very depressed about something physical in my life that is most likely permanent and will not change. I can accept things that I can change, but when I hate something that will probably be permanent, there is nothing I can do about it. When there is something in life that I hate so much and nothing I can do about it, it makes me so distraught, angry, and depressed. I feel like a lesser version of who I once was. I used to be such an outgoing and fun person and now I haven’t been out for months and months. I tried committing suicide a few weeks ago by OD’ing on sleeping pills but it didn’t work. Got taken to a hospital for about a week instead. Got them to let me out when I convinced them that I was OK. But I’m not OK and I’m looking to kill myself again pretty soon. I’ll just up the dosage of the sleeping pills so that I can fall asleep and never wake up. Life is just so unbearable for me. I can’t stand living life with such pain, anger, depression, and anxiety. The only peace I get is when I’m asleep and can live in my dreams. Hopefully when I die, I’ll be able to do just that, but permanently. I’ll miss my family and friends so much, but I barely talk to them anymore anyway. Hopefully when I die, at least I’ll be able to look down and see what goes on with my friends and family. I just don’t have the desire or will-power to live this hell that is currently my life.
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Wish i could help. ive tried to commit suicide before i didn’t take enough pills and only passed out : /, my only fear of dying would not be knowing how anyone reacts to it, you really shouldn’t kill yourself tho im sure you have loved ones that will be horribly hurt if you did
Hey Dan….this may be of help..think on it and see how it sits with you.
Most depression is buried/suppressed anger. A lot of us buried our feelings when we were younger cause we didn’t know how to express them at the time. We may have been dealing with things beyond our understanding.
Those emotions and feelings stay in the body and present themselves later on….there’s a lot of buried emotion that is wanting to come up and out and be released. For me, it was a lot of anger that I was scared to get in touch with…and the anger is a catalyst for clearing a lot of sh**. Maybe that will resonate with you. Just be as honest as you can with yourself about what’s inside, your past….and the reality or the facts are friendly and may help lift you. The pain is so great we don’t want to feel it, but that’s the path of going through that pain…it ultimately is a teacher and you do come out stronger on the other side. Fearless brother….fearless. Best of luck. Cheers!
@softsoul wow, u seem really smart, are u like a depressed/suicidal teacher or something? geez! hahaha…