I need to get away. From this crazy place called home. From this depression. And especially from myself. I don’t even know myself anymore. It makes everyday things so hard to do. I want to get away from all these tears. I’m pretty sure crying so much that you get sick isn’t good. I can’t take it anymore. Everything’s pushing me over the edge and I’m scared I’ll fall.
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How old are you? Couldn’t you just go and actually get away from it for a while?
yes i understand how u feel only too well. Im so constantly depressed most of the time and every morning i wake up i think oh no not another day and dont want to get out of bed. Im only still here because of family. My mother and daughter. But Im an empty shell and got nothing more to give. I cant help them with their problems as Im overwelmed with the darkness that hangs over me. Im going away next week. and just feel like losing myself in the rainforest and never coming out. My email address is jenny_xmas@hotmail.com. Please email me and maybe we can help each other
I’m only 14.
You should find a safe place where you can be alone with your thoughts outside of the house. A park, a field, if you’re in a big city a library might do the trick too. What pushed you to these feelings anyway?
People betrayed me so I can’t trust anymore. I had sex too young (which I didn’t really want to) which triggered depression. And my brother has been in and out of rehab for drugs and would constantly fight with my family and the cops would always be at my house. I got my heart broken way too many times. There’s too much to even explain. I’m young I shouldn’t have to go through this. No one should.
You’re right, no one should have to go through that. Is there a safe place you can go to get some distance? A family friend you trust? What country do you live in? I don’t know if foster care is an option for you, if the home life is too unstable. You should definately call a crisis hotline or talk to someone about the sex that you didn’t want to have… is this person still in your life?
It wasn’t rape or anything like that. It’s just he knew that I would do anything for him to stay with me because (I don’t care if u think I’m too young for this) I loved him. I still do. So he kinda pushed it onto me and said that if I didn’t do this or that then he would leave me and stuff like that. And yea he’s still in my life but not as much. We see each other at school sometimes but that’s it. And my home isn’t really unstable it’s just my parents don’t understand me and it’s annoying and they don’t trust me because they found out about the sex.
I’ve been in that situation before too (I think most women have, sadly), and technically it’s called ‘date rape’. On the one hand, you consented. On the other, you were co-erced against your will. I’m sorry you had to go through that, but hopefully now that you know how shitty it makes you feel, you will be stronger next time.
Of course your parents don’t understand you, you’re a teenager! There’s bound to be a generation gap. Do you have friends you can confide in, when the going gets tough at home?
Yea I have friends I can talk to but I never really do because I don’t trust anyone anymore.
cantdoitalone – the name says everything. Life is friggin hard! No one can do it alone! So at some point, you have to open up and trust someone… what point are friends if you can’t trust them? Just choose carefully who you confide in, make sure they are worthy of your trust. Or, is there a councillor you can talk to at your school? There are some free phone lines you can call and speak to a councillor. You should have someone to confide in, everyone needs that.