I’m so tired

  November 2nd, 2011 by nobodyyoudknow

Every day I wake up I think about how It would have been so much better If I had died in my sleep the day before. I’m terribly lonely and feel like life is a chore. I’ve felt this way for over a decade and I don’t believe anything can make it better. I think about how I would end my life a lot. I wonder why God made me this way or if he honestly cares. I’ve hurt so much for so long that sometimes I just cry in the dark when I’m alone. I diet, pray, act kindly and open but its all useless at the end of it all the feelings come back. The only thing keeping me alive is my responsibility to the people closet to me. I don’t want to hurt my family or my last good friend. I’m just sleepwalking through this world waiting to die.

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