(I was going to put this as a comment under my picture but, I didn’t really want to start a big discussion there about jobs and the economy)
Please, would someone just listen to me? Sometimes I feel like I’m talking to a brick wall.
I really, honestly appreciate the thoughts and ideas for what I can do. However, I am not stupid. I KNOW my options. I know what to do and how to be and what to say. Even though I’ve talked about myself in a few posts and comments here doesn’t mean you really know me or what my life is like.
I don’t think I could make this part any clearer but I’ll try again anyway; I live in a small town, in a small county. In this county therein lies the second highest unemployment rate in my state. There are a few small shopping centers here. I have applied to different retail jobs that supposedly were hiring for part time positions. Part time is the only position that is ever available anyway. Never even got a call back. I have never had a job in my life. Hence no experience. Hence nothing to put on a ‘resume’. I have no skills. I only have a high school education. I never did any extra curricular activities either. So I have no references.
Before you say go look for a job outside of my county (because if you don’t someone will) I also don’t have a car. I have no means of getting out of my immediate area. There are no local buses. **small town** Taxi? Forget it. What taxi? And how am I supposed to pay for it exactly? Bike you say? Okay I’ll just ride my bike 40 miles everyday to get to back and forth to town. Which brings me to my next point. I have no money. At all. Not even a fucking dime to my name. I had money saved up for my future car or an apartment and I spent it all on things I needed. I did spend some on stuff that I didn’t need but I wanted. I wish I could take that back; I can’t now.
My position now is to wait for some working class asshole to get fired or laid off so I can go in and steal his or her job.
Honestly, right now, I don’t even want any more advice. I don’t think I could take it. I just want someone to fucking listen to me “whine”.
One more thing, I know I’ve said this before, but just for emphasis; I have no hope for the future of the economy nor the world. I think it’s more than possible that a complete collapse will happen and only then will things begin to change. And I’m not going to make any apologies for feeling that way.
227 comments
Good job getting that out GG!
😡
quiet dawg
oops – the smiley was supposed to be the “Lips are sealed” emoticon
typo dawg
I sowwie…now i feel bad u.u
Ill shut up from now on..
if theres one thing ive learnt from this sight nd the amazen people on it (you included and expecially) is that there is always hope. im not going to make suggestions cause i know uve probably thought of them all… as for listen to u exspress ur self nd get things out there (never whine) thats what we hear for GG we hear to listen, we hear to help! nd appolagising would mean that ur wrong nd ur not GG u have an (annoying) habbit of being right… im going to stop now lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFBtX-e_5aM
For you: http://youtu.be/cINfR3EUKhs
Because we care 🙂
by your side dawg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjhCEhWiKXk
cause its true
I was living in the USA last year. It already HAS completely collapsed. I don’t really see how it’s going to recover either, there’s no social infrastructure and so people like you are… screwed.
Good on you for getting that out! I know it goes against the grain of your character to meet conflict head on like this, but if I’m not mistaken, this is you standing up for yourself!
if theres one thing i hate on this sight it is moderation
You made me cry and then you made me think of this song, which is about all of us in the same boat:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vALteFBmWs
“All I want to do is make some money
and bring you home some wine.
I don’t want you ever to see me
standing in that line.”
~ Ray Davies
sorry GoodGirl….i know you don’t want anymore suggestions….but i’m as thick as a brick sometimes…..just wanted you to know i face a similiar situation here….only i have a child to take care of as well…..anyhoooo…..i created a job for myself…..there are seniors and shut-ins who would love to have someone come in and help them with the silliest things…..cleaning, shopping, etc….i even have one woman that pays me to sit and smoke and talk to her……
i’m just worried that you are soooo depressed that you will quit trying…..no babysitting?….beer bottle collecting?….you don’t have to make a million dollars…..a fiver would probably go a long way right now…just saying
and as to the whining…..from one whiner to another….have go at it….get it out…..and then get up and fight again….just saying….i wish sometimes we weren’t on a computer…..would love to give you the biggest hug and kick in the ass….lol
BTW saw your picture….i don’t think you are pretty at all….and no i’m not a lesbian…….i find your picture haunting and beautiful…..weird i know…..but there is a lost haunted look in your eyes….you are more than pretty…..you are beautiful….and even though you are haunted….your true Spirit shines through your visage….and that Spirit is beyond description…..
Live, Learn, Love and Laugh
Amakua
I love all of you. And all of those songs. Thanks for listening to me and being understanding. All I wanted was to be heard and you gave me that. It is VERY out of character for me to stand up for myself and I had serious doubts about making this post but I did it anyway.
Amakua, those are actually not bad suggestions. Perhaps there is a haunted look in my eyes because I am a lost person. A lost soul?
Causeway, why did I make you cry?
if you didn’t know taylor, procel is really worried about you…what is going on?
GoodGirl….you got it all wrong….or more likely i said it wrong….again…lol
you are not a lost soul…..you are an old soul….you have seen too much etc….get it
that’s why you are as sensitive as you are…..which means unfortunately you suffer more…..it’s all good
Namaste
Probably because I’m pretty damn proud of you by now – so much adversity and you’re standing up to it like a trooper.
bye the bye….can you or someone help an old dog learn a new trick?
would love to post a picture as well….but don’t know how….i’ll ask my daughter if i have to…..but i can’t see y’all rolling your eyes at me…..what planet is she from etc?….lol
i have a scanner….help please….lol
Sol, I am in the process of emailing procel. Relax procel.
If I knew what was going on I wouldn’t even be here. Today is not a good day for me, tbh. I am on a rollercoaster today and it’s not pleasant.
Causeway, I don’t feel like a trooper at all. I have to go somewhere tomorrow and I’m not looking forward to it because I don’t feel like seeing happy faces everywhere and letting people see how miserable I am. I hate having to put on a “happy” face. It’s like torture.
Don’t put on a happy face, be as you are, as you feel. You don’t have to act, or perform, and if you make a habit of it you’ll be performing for other people your whole life.
lol at causeway…..another take….go…..be miserable….they won’t invite you back….lol
taylor, something is wrong behind every happy face, sometimes pushed to the back of the mind, sometimes the tears are falling, but no one can see. make it through if only to show them that you can. just like they do
@amuka
If they don’t invite you back because you’re yourself, or because you’re honest, or because you’re a little different, then fuck ’em, who needs ’em. She needs contemporaries not flunkies.
Okay then I won’t put on an act. I just feel weird about it.
“Okay then I won’t put on an act. I just feel weird about it.”
Sorry, qualifier – it depends who you’re going to see. Use your judgement; at least you’ll own the situation and be making a choice.
I’m not going to see any one inparticular, just going out in public to do a few things and I know that makes me sound like I have agoraphobia or whatever, I don’t have a problem being around people just when I feel like this. Like shit.
i agree completely causeway….did i say crap wrong again….lol
i not only agree…but live it….i don’t get many stupid invitations anymore…just important ones…..
social anxiety aside….i don’t know any other way to be than to just be….
when the cashier asks me how i am today…..i tell her….lmao
problem is…..what type of event is it GoodGirl….sometimes even I have to BEhave…lol
that is when i would suggest a little play-acting…..but just a little…..you are usually good natured….that would not be phony…..me i just learn to laugh….mostly at myself…..
this from a woman who took 3 days to get to the bank and pay the rent…lol
Screw all these people here and them telling you what to do. If they had all the answers they wouldn’t be here. Just do whatever you need to do. And if it’s a social function with free food and booze, hover near the bar and buffet. You will meet people there who don’t want to be there as much as you
Hmmm…..
I heard ya .. but im still replying … 🙂
Some Job ideas (ie only to make some money not career) ideas “if” i may ~
1) Babysitting for locals ~ even taking kids to & from school where parenst working
2) Offering to do the shopping &/or paperwork/admin stff for elderly.
3) If ur good at gardening related stuff (lawns) offer ur services for a modest fee
4) can u do any general admin type stuff like file/type ok ? …. are you good at word/excel perhaps, databases, webdesign ~ check out elance where all work is done online.
example ~
Someone Needs a list of 40 niche websites – blogs/sites with a page rank of 2 or more in the gift industry. The list should include an email address, page rank and URL. Seems like pretty std google research. Pay $500 max.
Just undercut everyone and do it for $250.
Guru . com is another site but its mostly IT orientated to those that have skills.
Do you have an interests/hobbies? Fashion, cosmetics, etc?
Start a blog by getting FREE blog templates and bookmark others to get ideas from. With time if you are able to build up a following, then you can actually sell advertising space and make money whilst u sleep!
Note, U have to think of an VG Internet Blog as a magazine. re format/layout/content/ and relevant to the target market of the advertiser eg : young women 16-25
Also, you could brrow some money perhaps from parents and buy/sell things that interest you on ebay and start a virtual store (cost is next to zip). I know a girl who buys/sells shoes and thats it and she makes $250+ ave per week (she has a FT job) but uses that spare cash to save for stuff.
Would selling Amway work in ur area?
When thinking of business ideas you need to think of what is useful/wanted in your local area. If it is elderly then, doing things useful for then will help – ie doing the sopping for them. $5-$10 per trip x 5 a day could get you $50 a day. I might be verly optimistic but you get my point. Even a little money is a good stepping stone.
If its a poor area, then maybe things like Amway might work if more cost effective?
If its a young area, then doing ‘nicer’ resumes/letters ie once u have a 3-4 templates, u just resuse these.
Finally, have you maybe considered things like volunteering for a year either elsewhere in the states or even Overseas?
eg co’s like volunteermatch can maybe help?
All the above is just some options to consider ….
ps u are not haunted lol …tried maybe from being on here too much 🙂
Ad Astra
And Lastly
@amuka, sorry, I misunderstood.
@gg – how often are you getting out of the house these days? When you stay in a lot, it tends to get a bit addictive, you feel safer there. I have that. But I don’t make going out say, shopping or for a walk, a decision about putting on an act – I just go into zombie mode. I reserve all the energy I have to put into social situations. Save your strength for battles not skirmishes.
ps: But dont tackle this today …do so when you are feeling better okay 🙂
Stay well ok.
Not a lot, causeway. I go outside on a daily basis but as for going places…hardly ever. i never have anywhere to go. No places to be. Obviously. So I should be a zombie? lol
Amakua, I’m sure I could read your suggestions eventually but I couldn’t make it past the first couple of sentences because I can’t focus on that right now.
Shit, I meant to say Ad Astra, not Amakua
@adastra leave it out, getting a job isint exactly at the top of the list for her (as the post says) nd GG as ye told me pretending to be normal only makes u more depressed. not saying go around with a gun shooting everything up but when someones a **** to u call em on it. start small like that nd ud be amased what u can end up doing lol
Oh and, ad astra, did you not read my OP? I said not to give me suggestions. Christ.
How bout dem Bearss?
hush puppie dawg
Hahahah, dawg. wth?
It worked! 😉
diversion dawg
Your diversion only worked for a minute.
You do need to get out more and with reason.
I told you I do the ebay selling thing – if you raise a little money and go shopping for stock once or twice a week it’s a good way of killing two birds with one stone.
Alright, but I don’t really have any thing to start with. No money to stock up on things. And the stuff I do have I am too attached to to sell. :[ lol
I guess that’s not a very good excuse.
Just so no one thinks I’m disappearing to off myself…I’ll be back in an hour or so.
nd just so u dont think im stalking u ill… ya im a bit of a stalker lol soz 🙂
I think you should just go to bed. I don’t think anyone is being really helpful and some things are better left to be a problem for tomorrow
Do your parents give an allowance or anything? If they don’t maybe you should speak to them and explain that you need some help to make a start. You only need a little to start out because you can pick up some stuff cheap at flea markets or charity stores. Sorry I don’t know how frequent such things are over there.
You do need a little bit of luck tho – I got started when I bought a box of books from a guy at a car-boot sale. It turned out they were all old 40s and 50s crime novels, some of which I made a bit of profit on. Then I toured looking for more stock. It’s hard- sometimes you make a profit, sometimes you make a loss, but at least you’re learning and keeping busy.
There is one flea market that is close by and it’s an early bird thing. lol I don’t know if they do it in the winter though…
There is also some place around my area called “Cow Town”. lmao They sell really cheap shit, it’s like a flea market but with cows and pigs and chickens and sweaty gross people.
I don’t have an allowance. I used to get such a thing when I was younger and any birthday money I got from relatives I would put into my account. That’s the money I used all up. And like I told you before my dad is the only one working right now and all of his money goes torwards the bills and groceries. So, yeah, we’re piss poor. I don’t know if I’d be more or less depressed if I sold all of my current belongings just to have some money. Not that I have a lot of belongings any way. I don’t have that much stuff, ya know? So selling it would be kind of like ‘wow, I have nothing now.’ I don’t know.
Also, I wanted to apologize to anyone that I told on here to just tell their parents about their thoughts and they’d understand and blah blah blah. Because my mother’s diagnoses just now was that i’m, and I quote, “a stick in the mud”. So, sorry, people. I was wrong. Sometimes they just don’t get it.
And procel, don’t know if you’re still up reading this but you did help me a little bit. All of you helped a little bit. At least you can understand how I’m feeling. I take comfort in that.
well, being always on the look out for buisness ventures if an investor/buisness partner is wanted…
wtf how does that need moderation?!
ya suppose u right @one_day… wish i could of been more helpfull GG
@procel i am sure u were helpful. Sometimes help just means hearing out a rant rather than ramming suggestions down soneones throat. U weren’t doing that!
Uve been tagged by the moderation police!!!
i know but i wanted to have a magical solution… those little bastards as if annyone turns down a comment unless the comments really abusive!!
@procel sometimes the only magical solution you need is a friend who accepts you just the way you are. Aim for that and you’ll never disappoint
kinda hard being so far away… but i suppose ur right one_day what time is it in oz?
@procel yr talking and emailing right? So I think your being a good friend. 10.20am Australian eastern time
i can try anyway… so ur bout 11 hours ahead there. guess i could do with a bit of sleep. see ye tommorow, or later today for some of ye, nd thnx One_Day
Sweet dreams of countless sheep, Irish
So… now you’re a Bearss fan?
LMAO
sly dawg
*chicago accent* Da Bearsss ;]
course im up, said id stay till u back lol nd its nice to know i helped a little nd there no way u a “stick in the mud” although at that an image of ur bridge came to mind lol
lol. how’d you know that’s what my bridge looked like? stalker…. :]
I wrote you back, check your email.
Sorry about the mum… Well at least you tried… But its true some people dont get ir. Well babe you got us… Cow town sounds awesome as far as small town entertainment goes
Thanks one_day. I did try. Seems like a lot of trying. I don’t know what else to say to her just short of ‘when you say things like that it makes me want to off myself, thanks mom’.
oh and, cow town is sooooo much fun.
Sarcastic Girl
“There is also some place around my area called “Cow Townâ€. lmao They sell really cheap shit, it’s like a flea market but with cows and pigs and chickens and sweaty gross people.”
lol, that was the family business on my father’s side – his first job was as a ‘cow-walloper’ – he had to whip them through the streets of Belfast to the abbatoir. This was way back in the 1950s before all the supermarkets put the local meat and dairy people out of business.
I take it none of your family or relations run a business that could give you a start or some experience? You’d be surprised at how many people get a start that way.
lol “cow walloper” don’t know why that’s so funny, but it is.
Honestly, no. No one in my family has a business or a means to hire me into one. I wish. I’m not close to them anyway. I’m in a pretty bad predicament.
u described it somewhere along the line, if i recall u were unsure wether it would have worked or not due to the marsh?
Yes, that’s true I did say that. good on you for remembering.
lol at GoodGirl…..try it and let us know how it works out…..lol
What Cow walloping?
There are millions of young people out of work, gg, you’re not alone; and an awful lot of people know what you’re going thru, because we went thru it ourselves. I was out of work for 3 years after I left uni – took me that long to find a job. It was soul-destroying in many ways. And I panicked a lot because I thought I’d never find anything. But I had a home to live in and food on the table and I educated myself and read a lot and prepared myself. You have some of that going on; it’s a bottom line anyway.
Yeah, I know. It’s good to know I’m not alone. And in the same sense it’s not good to know. It is very soul-destroying. And I do feel like I’ll never find anything. I’m glad that at least I’m not homeless and have food to eat. I don’t know, when you’re down it’s hard to see the good in anything. And it’s even more impossible to think happy thoughts. ;]
btw GoodGirl….i didn’t suggest what i did for the obvious money situation….that would be secondary…..the best pay comes from having a purpose and some meaning in your life….and the pay sometimes comes with a hug or two…..
my problem was finding the energy to get past the apathy to even look
then when i decide to look….how to approach people….social anxiety remember….
just put out a small advert…..had no problem dealing with people one or two at a time….been doing it for 8 years now….some of them are more family than anything….and I’ve gotten some wonderful rewards….oh yeah and they pay good too….lmao
once you start with one or two….the rest is word of mouth…..and you won’t know where to find the time for everything you want to do….might be a nice change….hmmmm?….i know that the longer i sit and feel sorry for myself….the harder it is to come back…..and the more damage i do to myself….more worried about your state of mind rather than the money in your jeans….that will come….
or theirs the “cow walloper”…..lol
You’re right. I am in an apathetic state of mind as well about looking. Getting shot down reinforced that. I guess if anything, if I can’t find a job, there’s a senior center not far from me. don’t know if they need volunteers but i can find out.
Cow walloping is a last resort. ;]
my younger sister volunteered making beds at a seniors home….within a month she was employed full time…..paid for her nurses training…..you just never know……now about the apathy….lol
yeah team
The only thing is it’s just a senior center for during the day time for the old folks to go to to play games and such. lol So I don’t think there will be any making beds or anything very “nursey” about it.
i joined a senior’s cribbage league once…it was a blast…..so you play some cards….sweep some floors…and even better….they have homes……
so they mention one day that they need someone to help with something and ask if you know of anyone…..and Jack’s your uncle….even better…no cost for advert
just saying
lol right on, amakua. not bad.
thank you GoodGirl….i don’t often get good press….lol
btw guys…secret meeting….lmao…..what’s up with Lon3….am I missing something obvious…..not that it would be the first time….i’m worried….hope i haven’t broken any rules here….i just feel for the guy….you know what i mean???
You’re welcome. Probably the best suggestion I’ve gotten all day.
Some secret meeting. lol Am I the only one that showed up? I know what you mean and why don’t you ask him what’s up amakua?
Hear that Lon3….the posse is coming to get you….lol…..GoodGirl says I should ask you what’s up….I hope i read that right…lol…..sooooo What’s Up?….secret meeting over….seconded…closed…lol
Seriously….I sense you have something more to say….could be wrong…often am…
no harm intended….ever
Love Always
You guys got my whole shi-bang story but I’m always down for a top super secret squirrel meeting with friends.
Hey Lon3. Who doesn’t like super top secret meetings? lol I read your story. How are you feeling today?
:-b
hey Lon….check out Dawg’s latest comment….seriously….if you already have….forgive me….
Head Squirrel reporting for duty…..lol
who’s bringing the nuts????? lol
I wish I had the nuts. I promised beach sunset pictures for mwtele but only make it to my deck and the street in front of my house. I’ll post them for him. I’m doing ok, seems like the situation only gets worse and the longer I stick around the harder it is on everyone else.
I want to see those pictures too. I wish I had something to say about your situation. But I just had to be talked down today myself, so I don’t think I could be of any help. :/
Amakua…come back to the meeting.
Hahaha…forgot about the pics Lon3…lol.
Lon3…hang in there buddy. hang in there 🙂
Goodgirl, well thank you for letting them talk you down. I don’t know you and besides the fact that you’re very attractive, just from looking at your picture I can tell you have a certain glow or ora to you that is very unique. You look like you’re very capable of helping people out whether you know you are or not. Thanks for staying with us.
Lon3, I don’t know whether to say you’re welcome or thank you, but I appreciate that. :]
I didn’t, I just need to download them 🙂
I may have had about 39 too many drinks last night. so i completelly forgot about asking for pics. I do love sunsets and have never seen one on the west coast
You were drunk last night, mw? lol
Usually every other day. Been really hard making it through life these last few weeks. I’m much more open and willing to talk when I’m drinking too. No drinks tonight though. Just a mountain dew amp.
Nothing is more therapudic then a few cocktails and Modern Warfare 3…lol.
I took my “few” a bit too far. Noticed my fifth was almost gone this morning. oops!!!
Well, now that I think about it you were a bit…off.. last night. lol
Mwtele, roger that.
I definately use the alcohol to make me feel worse because I know the end if near for me but again…..I have been delayed. This is getting old. Guess I’m meant to hang around for a bit longer
I think I have played MW3 about 3 or 4 times, only played survival with my son. Like it better than zombies from Black Ops. I can’t play online because I SUCK bad.
Mwtele, I selfishly want you to still around to be here for me. You said all the right stuff drunk yesterday. You even made me laugh.
Yeah GG…I was in bad shape yesterday. Didn’t wanna on SP because I didn’t want to risk feeling better. I just was very very broken all yesterday and all day today until a bit ago. I hate the ups and downs.
I think you said you felt better last night talking to us. I hate the ups and downs too, mw. I don’t think i’ll be hanging around here all night tonight to chat because I was so stressed out today and now my chest is kinda sore.
I do that a lot when i’m here too Lon3 (laugh and smile) but somedays I just don’t wanna feel that. yesterday was one but after drinking I found my way to the computer and off I went.
I suck too, but I like playing with my brother and old buddy back east. It’s like they’re there for me in a firefight and we don’t talk anything but tactics. I don’t know but I feel good.
I’ll be here a bit longer Lon3…you aren’t being selfish at all. I really enjoy chatting with all of you guys. It’s great to know that someone feels what I feel and isn’t calling me crazy or telling me the “right” way to fix things
I didn’t want to either but I did too. At the moment it feels so good.
I was reading your post and comments earlier on my phone. I was at work and I had a hard time keeping the tears away. Didn’t want anyone to see that. Don’t want anyone to know what’s going on.
Damn, mw, that’s the second person I made cry today. Now I feel kinda bad.
I hear ya Lon3
I made someone cry today too :c
It made me sad…but also happy to cause pain >:c
And hi mwtele o.o
no it’s alright. It wasn’t you. it was everything in general with everything being said here. But you did start it with your post :). I have to put on an act everyday at work and around family (when they come around) and it is very tiring. When you sign off tonight have a good one and take a break for yourself. Take a nice, warm mental vacation for a bit.
I see. You could relate to what was said. I made myself cry then they all made me cry. It was one big tear fest today. I’m pretty emotionally drained. And yeah. I think I will take that mental vacation tonight. Thanks.
hey attheend….no more ATE…lol
lol good I thought I’d have to stab someone…or multiple people at least o.o
and when dawg was talking to Lon3 earlier about fighting and being strong…..that just broke me even worse. thanks dawg. 🙂
I sat on the couch all day today waiting for the day to end. It was such a nice day and I hated the fact that I couldn’t force myself to go outside. The gym was my release but now what’s the point. I don’t even eat anything any more, I had a poptart yesterday and one today. I just don’t feel like it.
Lon3, I don’t really have an appetite either. I know how that feels. And you live on the west coast right? So it must be nice. It’s so freezing cold here on the east coast.
i think if you make someone cry on this site, at least for me, it’s a good thing. I cry cause someone actually takes the time to show that they care for someone. that is something that has been missing from my life.
I agree, it is a good thing. I let’s you know someone cares enough about you to say those things.
Lon3 i went through the same thing about a month or two ago. the good thing is I lost about 25lbs. Depression sucks and I know what you are going through. Nothing anyone can say is going to change your mind right this second. But don’t forget that they are people here that will listen and can ease your pain for at least a moment.
I’ve read your story from the beginning. I just hope that something shows up to make things a bit better. I have no idea what that might be. But it will come when you truly truly need it. You are down now but I guess not far enough. I hope that doesn’t sound wrong. I know what I mean, I just can’t put it in words now.
@ Lon3…..so you see the same thing in her picture that I do…..cool….makes me feel better
that’s what I’m here for guys – thank YOU
MW3 pointman dawg
you can’t play MW3 dawg…..your xboxs are broke…lol
Stop discussing video games T~T Before I friggin blast you guys with a scar assault rifle DX
My boss did call and ask how I was again today. I got: “Dont isolate yourself” and “We’re on your side” and “Are you having any…feelings…feelings of…how are you feeling?” I just Yes Sir’d him. I don’t want anyone at work to know what I’m thinking. This is between you guys and me…well my pups too, they oddly read me and have been staying extra close and giving extra kisses. Kinda weird.
thanks for reminding me mw – now I’m gonna jump … good bye cruel xbox-less world!
ps3 is better anyways…lol
Lon3, I hope we can help you.
Lon3 that is good that someone is asking about you. No one asks about me. I wish they would. But I wouldn’t say anything. Everyone thinks I’m fine because I didn’t do it a couple months ago. You don’t have to tell the people around you anything. But do realize that they have at least a bit of interest and if need be, could be an option for you.
Soooo…mwtele….would you like it to be your turn….these are a real group of hard asses on this site…Wilson!!!….lol…..how are you doing mwtele….do tell??
It isn’t all fun…trust me….just ask lon3….or Dawg….orGoodGirl…and many many others….we play for keeps around here…..because we care….truth….
bye the bye ATE…..what’s up with the shit tonight….not sure whether we should be focusing on you instead….lol….not your usual self????….just watch the tone please….please…..please…..i’m raw today…..can’t take the hate….just saying
Namaste
gotta go fulfill a promise to a friend
good night to those who will be gone when I return….sorry…I am coming back…lol….
and till we convene again to those who will still be here
Live, Learn, Love,Laugh….Always Laugh
Well the suicide rate doubled in the military during the last decade of war so they are always proactive with that stuff now a days.
No, no amakua…i do stuff for others. that’s how i’ve always been. don’t like people doing stuff for me because it makes me feel shitty. I wish the people in my daily life would ask about me. everyone at SP is always concerned and trying to say something to make me smile or laugh. I’m all set with the help here. it’s just my “real” life that needs work and it’s been the way it is for 30 plus years so it’s gonna take about as long to fix it unless I head out before then.
I understand that Lon3. My family found out about my intentions and after I convinced them I was fine then they went back to their lives. I don’t blame them for that at all. Your boss could have done the same thing but he isn’t. Just keep that in mind.
OI! Spartan!
I’ve been wondering…
Where were you stationed?
Irak recently as in your last two or three tours? O.o
And for that matter did you command? if so which unit? o.o..
Did you start off as a basic soldier? Officer school?
Scout? Ranger School? :c
Sowwie…I’m curious and wondering if you and a friend ever served
at the same time but I’m kinda doubting it :/
@mw, “everyone at SP is always concerned and trying to say something to make me smile or laugh.” That’s because we know how it feels. And people in “Real Life” don’t understand.
Yes worked my way up from a wee E-1. Fought in both wars and been all over the world for the last almost but not quite 20yrs.
Mwtele, we all care about you dude. But you know that.
I see then since you’ve had such a long service record
I don’t think you’ve ever met my friend while overseas though
You’ve probably too high up as well XD
lon – I had the distinct pleasure of going in at E-2 and out at E-1 lol
Talent I telz ya 😉
former sp4 dawg
Not that high, AtTheEnd. The military is so big I probably don’t know your buddy. I was in Kandahar in July and that base is like a frig’n city its so huge. Still gets rocketed pretty good.
Dawg, lol.
Dawg, I don’t even think they HAVE Sp4s anymore!
Well… let’s see…my friends an airborne army ranger sniper
o.o he’s tiny as hell..like 5’2″…he’s brown skinned and Asian…his last name is super long so they called him alphabet cuz it has almost every letter of the alphabet in it. At one point he took an Ak round in the shoulder after his helicopter went down…other than that he’s a loud mouth don’t know that probably describes hundreds or thousands of active soldiers lol o.o
Colonel – you gonna try and put on a brave face and go to work tomorrow? I think you should force yourself to go in – 1. to give your mind something regular and relatively stress free to focus on and 2. it will at least give your workmates some peace of mind – sure – tell them you’re “worried” and stressed about your CM but brush it off as silly when they say “are you having ‘feelings’?” maybe it will be enough to get to talk to someone but not so much to think you’re “in trouble”
get through one day at a time
baby steps dawg
There’s a reason the call me “Grandpa dawg” around here 😉
Already told them I have a meeting with my lawyer. Then the weekend is here and no one will F with me. You guys will have me all weekend unless I grow balls which is doubtful.
you have the CIB right? that ballz enough for everyone here!
I was never “tested” … unless you consider internal unit political bickering “combat”
and as evidenced by my separation rank – I lost
live and learn
e-0 dawg
Amuka Said “BTW saw your picture….i don’t think you are pretty at all….and no i’m not a lesbian…….i find your picture haunting and beautiful…..weird i know…”
I am a lesbian and if I say another female is beautiful it is no different than you saying it. It doesn’t mean I want to have sex with them or are even attracted to them. It means that I thought they were visually beautiful and nothing more.
sorry uttilini….was very late….and i have a problem saying what i really mean at the best of times…..you should know that….
but i was not just talking about the visual that most people are aware of…..just weird that way….no offense ever meant….and please keep in mind….not an excuse…just the truth….i am friggin’ old…..seriously no harm intended
Namaste
btw…nice to see you back again….
@uttilini & amakua, honestly, I wouldn’t care if either of you were lesbians. A compliment is a compliment no matter who it comes from and what your orientation is. I wouldn’t have thought you were hitting on me or wanted to have sex me. Just sayin…
Thanks for that you guys. I know that not everyone means to be saying something bad about gays etc. I know that. It’s part of our culture right now to rag on gay people and so as a gay person I tend to hear it more easily than the average. You really weren’t that bad. I mean you go on youtube or whatever and you hear people say things like “that music is gay you must be a fucking ******” etc. Mostly I don’t notice it but I do feel for younger people reading that crap. I try to counter it just for that reason. I can’t wait until the day that it is not cool to hate gay people. And amakua I know you don’t hate gay people. I just went on a short ramp. You’re cool .
I meant rant not ramp. lol
thank you uttilini….i hear ya….loud and clear…..so maybe you will do me the honour of hearing me?????
i don’t hate anyone……except my doctor…..lol….that’s why we explain…ask questions…..i know i am ignorant…..but it isn’t terminal i’m told…..
it’s all good here and so i continue as always
Live, Learn, Love and Laugh…..always Laugh
If I ain’t dead….I’m learning….perhaps learning to be dead….who knows….
uttilini, I have to disagree with you. I think today’s culture it is NOT COOL to rag on gays and the people on this site are very non-judgemental. More non-judgemental than the main stream. I’m pretty conservative but if you’re gay, I don’t have a problem with it, you’re not hurting anyone. My gay buddies (guys and girls) enjoy arguing with me about gay rights, then we laugh it off and have another drink 🙂 They think its funny that I’m uber straight but I’m still their best friend. I wouldn’t give up their friendship for anything. I think we’re all taking the comment out of context.
Im straight nd my best friend keeps trying to shift me when im drunk nd we still tight the next day (he gay) we do bust his balls from time to time over it but we allways make sure he knows we love him (if not in that way) there are always people who love to hate they dont care who as long as they have some reason skin colour, sex, sexual orientation it suks but u cant change em
Procel, Hahaha! Yeah, my buddies are the same till its just me and them, then they let me have it! It’s all cool 🙂
I have to agree with Lon3, I think more and more people now are waking up and realizing that it’s not cool to hate on gay people. Although, there are some that “tolerate” them. Which is a fucking shit thing to say. In my opinion a person who ‘tolerates the gays’ or hates on them, is a ******.
Its as if no isint in his fkn vocabulary lol
@GG the sad thing is that those who tolerat the gays expected to be complimented on being so opened minded nd caring i mean wtf?
Procel, yeah, I know. They’re fucking idiots. Tolerate isn’t the same thing as acceptance.
is it just me or isit how as brains go down looks/ brawn goes up, with the exception of u od course 😉 (nd all others on the site)
No, it’s not just you. Pretty people tend to be stupid. Isn’t there some saying about how you can’t have looks and smarts?
But, thank you. :]
im glad someone else found that aswell, was begining to think i was the oly one nd thank me for what, the truth? 😀
No, you definitely aren’t the only one. & I told you it was in my nature to thank. :]
well its in my nature to not deserve em lol nd how u been?
Yes you do. You know the other day when I was in a really bad place you were there for me. You really showed you cared. And that for one, deserves thanks.
I’m, eh, okay? I don’t really know, tbh. I feel like I should feel good but, I don’t. How are you?
Still could of done more… it takes time to get better, nd no time to get worse lol. im begining to feel a bit clausterphobic here. need to get out but cant, not without questions i dont want to answer, nd havent self harmed in too long, so all in all im great
I don’t think there was anything more you could have done, procel. You did your best. And that’s all that matters. “it takes time to get better, nd no time to get worse” That is so true. I hate it.
You can’t get out of the house without being assaulted with questions? I’m glad you haven’t self harmed.
theres always more just couldnt find it lol its like flipping a switch sometimes, it suks
Well i can lie nd say i meating friends but i always use that, on the plus side i gettten up to my appartment tommorow night so i can survive. im not, while is annoying to hide i quite like it
Why do you do that? There’s nothing any one could really do for me, I told you that.
If you can lie, maybe you should. No sense in getting claustrophobic.
I just can’t cut. Makes me feel sick.
Hmm too stubron to agree with u there babe
Ive lasted 18 years this way, just barely keeping it in, why change now lol
I feel the same with fags litteraly cant do more than half a fag lol but the cutting feels ggggggooooodddddddd 🙂 besides i keep em just above scaring depth so no harm done
Ye stubborn arse. ;]
Well, only change if you want to live longer. Which you’ve made clear that you don’t want to. :/
Ehh, don’t get into too much detail please. It’s not blood that makes me sick. It’s like this same feeling I get when I’m watching a movie and they show random eye-gouging. Makes me cringe.
well thats not true darlin it just that im right nd convincing others takes time lol
I believe that something comes after this (at least at this moment nd time i do) do in theory i wouldnt be dying, just… moving on. love those movie!!!
lol You know that I’m always right, not you. ;]
I don’t think anything comes after this life.
You love eye gouging? ewww lol
u cant because u wrong there!!! lmao
I usually dont either but when arguing or anything it sometimes help to believe in an after life lol
i love action movies more than i gouging, its just they usually happen in action movies lol
No I’m not!
Well, I never do. Not even when arguing. lol
Hm, that’s probably why I don’t like too many action movies.
whatever
One word answer…you mad?
no i just… i dunno ill be back when i feel better… or worse
What’s wrong procel? I’m sorry if I said something to hurt your feelings. :[
Maybe he got distracted.
We posted at the same time. SO never mind. oopsss
@uttilini read the method. with the electricity? it says he put em on the too arms but would over the heart not be better?
its nothing GG
Yeah, okay, I’m sure it’s nothing. And then to ask uttilini about a method right on my post? I mean…come on. Talk to me.
Oh crap you got that book.
Yeah I don’t know…. I have given it a lot of thought. I think it would be painful if you didn’t do it right. What’s wrong Procel? Why are you in such a bad place all of a sudden? DId something happen?
ya ur right GG… @uttilini email me at “real-foudy@hotmail.com”
no. nd would u need perscription pills or what?
Look, if it’s what I said about the afterlife. I don’t care what you believe in. That’s not a problem to me. You have the right to believe in whatever you want to. I was kidding about always being right, you know that.
Nah I don’t want to do this procel. When I gave you that title I wasn’t in a good way that day. It’s all laid out I think. I am just sorry you feel you want to die.
Its not anything u said GG
Then what is it? I don’t get it. Why all of the sudden do you want to die?
there is nothing wrong i am fine. i just want to perfect a method that is all
Why now?
because i have just seen the method and have questions that is all. there is nothing wrong i am fine
Well I don’t know any more about it than you do. That’s the truth.
YOur sudden shift in responses makes me and GG think there is something very wrong and it’s not working to try to say you just want some perfect method.
that is disappointing. there is no need to worry about me either of ye, i am fine
That’s a shit excuse, procel, and you know it.
NOt from what you said in your email to me.
The thing is now people will blame me. ANd GG will think you did it cuz of her.
Seiously Procel. YOu gotta hang on here.
Yeah, well, I already think it’s my fault. I can’t really handle this right now.
ok
deal with ur stuff GG nd how could it be ur fault?
because obviously i said something to you be it here or email that fucking upset you. and you just won’t say what it is.
and deal with my stuff? real nice. like i wouldn’t give a shit if you went and offed yourself.
U DIDNT DO ANYTHIN GG, i just… im sorry GG i dont mean to upset u u know that. nd come on u know i didnt mean it like that GG
we need to stop beating up on each other. this site has brought us together and we all care about each other and feel responsible for each other and worry about everything we say to each other. let’s stop reading too much into words and accept one another’s assurances.
I don’t know Procel I could see some lawyer finding a way to make it my fault. So I will just say this. I bet it’s painful and I wouldn’t recommend it.
Truth be told I was going to do it the other day and as I thought about it more I thought “Hell no” because if you aren’t out right you will feel horrendous pain. Just a thought.
Haha everythings good 😀 sorry about earlier nd i agree with causeway 😀 nd uttilini they would have no reason to search for anything cause it would have been a suicide (but i wouldnt, im happy now 🙂 )
now I wanna say “whatever”
agreed.
haha 😀 i deserve that lol 🙂 but i dunno i could feel myself slippen nd then… i dunno with GG being so concerned i was blowen away so GG even though it wasnt ur fault u brought me back before i fell… no ones ever been able to do that, not even me
I may not have shown it the way you’d understand it but I care too Procel.
But as usual I do not matter. It’s no one’s fault here. Just the case everywhere lately. Fuck. I fucking hate life.
Don’t say that uttilini, you matter. I care about you.
read my email man!
Thanks GG. I care about you too. That’s why I stuck in here and tried to help.
Yes, you did. I’m sorry I didn’t say thank you for hanging around trying to help, sooner. So, thank you. :]
I’m not reading anymore of your email messages Procel. YOu used me. Period.
well how do expect a explenation then. u know what i dont care read it if u want, dont if u dont im outa here
Stop with damn fighting.
I think you’re a few minutes too late, att. lol
Who’s fighting?
He’s just in keeping with his username LOL
last dawg to the party
LMAO.