I screwed up I have been clean for just over a year… no cutting or pills… everything just seems to be going great but it almost feels to good to be true… I don’t understand why I did it but I broke… I started again and well I can’t tell anyone because I am afraid of what happened last time. I am afraid I will get really bad again but at the same time I want to get that bad because I was soo close to endinging it and I still wish I did.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
1 comment
Well still grats on being able to be clean for so long…
I think a step would be trying to figure why you “broke” and started again. Don’t beat yourself up about it though…I know it probably feels like a set back and your back to where you started – but I don’t think that’s completely true. I think it shows you can do it, and it isn’t impossible. Anything any of us can do for you to help you through it and maybe find your way back to being clean?
How’d you do it in the first place?( Curious since I have yet to even quit cutting once… and plus it may help for getting out of it again ).
I know what you mean by being afraid yet if you get there at least maybe that can be the end… I think there is something to be said about you being afraid though, because I don’t think you really WANT to be in pain and depressed again… I think you want more of a way out – and yes suicide is one way, but just ONE not the ONLY…
I may not really know you, but doesn’t mean I can’t be glad you didn’t end it. Plus look you had a mostly good year even though you didn’t leave, did you not?
Hope you can find your way back to a great time, don’t jinx yourself about it being too good to be true though heh – you deserve some good in life.