life will guide you.

so i haven’t really posted anything lately because life has been alright. my bestfriend and i don’t talk anymore.  i still love him, i think i will always love him, but i couldn’t take it anymore. he told me to never look at him, because he doesn’t want people knowing he knows me. it’s fine though because i’m becoming stronger, and i’m on my road to recovery. i haven’t cut myself in almost two months, and i haven’t made myself throw up in a month and a half. i’m not happy, but i’m not depressed. i’m peaceful? i don’t really know how to explain my emotions, but i’m still going to write on here. truth be told, i have cried a lot since he and i ended out friendship, i do miss him but i think the only way we can both be somewhat happy is if we aren’t around eachother, especially since he’s bitter about it. sometimes you just have to stop, don’t try to fight it, don’t try to understand it, just stop. let it be.  a month ago, i would have never known i would have become this strong. there’s hope for everyone, you just need to take the first big step then life will guide you along.