My parents are fighting about money again. Â Bitching about how much money mom doesn’t make. Â It’s really really hard for this to not affect me. Â And it seems like all he ever does is belittle my mom. Â He’s trying to force her to get a different job, one that she doesn’t enjoy.
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I know how it feels my mom and dad fight all the time about money………my dad ad three jobs………….my mom has none……..she smokes and drinks ALOT………..but what job does he want to make your mom to do? Buiness? gas Station? Cop? How is he forcing her verbaly or Phyiscly?
My mom is currently a massage therapist, but he thinks she doesn’t make enough money, and thinks she would make more working at McDonald’s. He wants her to do some shitty job like that. It’s all verbal, and he threw something earlier which is when I went down and told them to stop. He told me to basically go the fuck away. Nothing’s been thrown since, but if I hear something like that, or mom starts crying, I’m going back down. Thank goodness for an old house with vents that let you hear anything anywhere in the house.
No way someone working at McDonald’s makes more than a massage therapist. Does yr dad drink or get violent? What’s his job?
He works in the IT department of Andersen Windows. He makes a lot more than my mom.
Working at McDonald can give you a for sure less money………….. Well atleast not physical but it is still bad if they are fighing………A massage therispist is a good wage I think……….What does your dad do? Dont go back down with out a kind of spray because if e gets in your face you can spray with him with something my prefeerable is water or like idk moutain dew…..throw him off track for a sec
Oops sorry abotu asking the “wat does he do” I didnt refresh the page………….Well e could pro.. hook her up with a job like that
mom doesn’t understand technology at all. she can barely figure out her cell phone. I don’t have to go down with anything, because I know how to get him out of my face, verbally and physically. Plus I don’t care if he hits me, as long as it isn’t mom. I’m going to take a shower and try to block them out with the water. Prob won’t work, but I don’t want to listen to them anymore. the water isn’t loud enough to cover the sound if he starts throwing things though, which is a good thing.
Don’t put yourself in danger. Hae you ever talked to your mum about leaving him?
yeah. she said she won’t cuz she loves him. that’s why I don’t believe in love. They stopped fighting now, and dad explained it all to me. if you could call it an explanation. Sounded more like excuses to me, but hey, no one was hit and I guess they solved this months money problems. Now just have to dread the end of next month. It’s always when the bills come. I’m taking a personal finances class and we learned about making and following budgets, so I sent both my parents an email with an attached spreadsheet that has a budget outline and told them to fill it out and then give it to me so I could put it together without them knowing what each put down. and then printing it and sticking it all over the house. Then we might not have as many money issues.
Money is probably the number one issue that causes conflict in relationships emotionless. It must be even more so since the economic recession that makes it even harder for people to make a decent living. I just want to say tho’ that I think you are a very caring son/daughter, to see your Mom’s side of things and want to defend her right to do a job she enjoys, to defend her against your dad. They are lucky to have you.
Zoe x
It’s smart of you to put it all together in excel for them. Hopefully it will cut down the amount of fights. Your situation sounds volatile and I think you should start thinking of plans, if hings get bad, so you can act quickly. Like, pack a small overnight bag. I things get violent, call the police, grab the bag and run until it all settles. Do you have a part time job? Is it worth opening a seperate bank account that your parents don’t know about so you have savings if you need to leave home?
I already have my own savings account that my parents can’t touch, and I’ll hopefully be getting a job soon, since the place I applied for called back. If I did the whole running thing, my parents would convince the cops that I was running away from home again(with the intent of staying away). My dad says he didn’t look at it, and I told him he should. He says they already have a budget, but I told him that from looking at how they fight about the same thing every month, that they don’t or don’t have the same one. What really sucks is when I’m right about these things but he’s too dense and obstinate to realize and accept that. My parents make me feel like I already have kids. Which is NOT a good thing. My counselor asked me last week who the adult of the family was. I told her it was me because I was always telling my parents not to fight, and being the mature one. I kind of wish my sister could come home for a while and help me with this, but she’s 2 hours away….and ironically(I guess), they don’t fight when she IS here. bleh. stupid parents.
Congrats on the call back! Hope it goes well.
I’m going to level with you: chances are the fighting has nothing to do with money, and they would be fighting anyway. The money is just an excuse. They probably have relationship problems and you can’t fix that, only they can.
You probably are right, but fact is you’re a kid so they’re not going to listen to you (sorry, that’s how it goes). The best thing you can do in this situation is not challenge your dad, don’t get involved. It’s hard, my dad is the same way and I have a temper so I can’t help reacting, but trust me it’s better to keep your head down and bite your tongue. Chances are, that’s how he is and he’s not going to change, or if he does change, it won’t be because of anything a kid says. Dont worry, in a few years you’ll be an adult and you can do whatever you want. Glad you got a sister and councillor anyway. Good to have support. I know what it’s like to have stupid immature parents but the more you interfere the more you’ll get blamed for bein a smart assed kid. Just keep quiet until you can move out.
haha sorry I have to laugh at the second to last sentence. Because I AM a smart-ass. And I’m actually smart to lol. A genius smart-ass. Something everybody hates. 🙂 I know they have relationship issues, but they argue about that during the month, not at the end. It’s always when the bills come that this happens. So I’m pretty sure this one’s mostly about money, but yeah there’s some other stuff in there too. I have a temper as well, and REALLY suck at keeping my head down and biting my tongue. haha it’s against my very nature to do things like that. meh. some day it will probably end. maybe.