Ok. If you self-harm, or think no one cares about you, you should probably read this.

So I just woke up after a good 18 hours of sleep, so I’m going to post what’s on my mind while I have the energy. Throw rocks at me if you will.

So many people here don’t genuinely seem to be suicidal. Yes, I am aware that also many of you are. But a lot of people are just here to cry for attention or are depressed because a lack of attention from others. Crying for attention among other people who are here because they want attention, or because they are suicidal (and a lot of people who are suicidal are self-absorbed or caught up in their own thoughts)… well, it’s not the best place to ask for attention. It’s like asking a bunch of cynics to give you a positive message. Sure, there will be people who are still equipped to offer you help or camaraderie, but also keep in mind: no one can baby sit you. At the end of the day, it is up to you to face the world, to face your problems, to learn to not only talk, but to listen (because this is the way friendships are built – it is never one-way), to give care as much as to ask for it back.

With long tirades about how life sucks and how you hate yourself; if that’s what you truly want to express, that is fine. But no amount of people telling you, no, you’re a great person, is going to suffice your need for positive affirmation, unless it comes from yourself. I honestly also think, if you want to cut yourself, say it, scream it, do it. I don’t see the harm in a bit of ultimately harmless self-indulgence. You are not chopping your fingers off nor are you killing yourself. But don’t use it as a vehicle to get attention. It will scare healthy people away, or you may have the brief sympathy and empathy of those in the same boat or those who care about you, but the attention you get will be like a shot of a drug. Just like cutting itself. It never fixes anything, but to give a bit of relief perhaps, and then the confirmation that people care about you if they tell you ‘no, please don’t’, and if they don’t say anything, it will probably make you feel even more un-cared for and like shit.

And then there’s this. Some people, no matter how much you want them to care about you – never will. It’s life, and it fucking sucks. We have to toughen up with it and learn to deal. And learn to live. Or we can writhe in misery (as the way I am now). Or we can end our lives, because it’s the best decision for us.

Negative energy just feeds into more negativity.
Positive energy brings more positive energy.
The problem is that a lot of the time, sending out negative energy gives us brief moments of positive feedback – but that only lasts briefly, and it can never be sustained. If what you truly want is for others to care for you. Then go care for someone else. Don’t mope and cry, “But no one loves me!” The truth of the world is that people love people who love themselves. And that doesn’t have to mean you have to be a self-centered asshole.

You really want to be cared for?
Then learn to care for others, and yourself.
Go to a shelter, help feed the hungry. Draw a picture for a terminally-ill child at the hospital. You can’t be loved without loving first. (Unless it’s familial love, and I’m sure that’s not even the case in many of your stories).

You can be angry at what I wrote. But a lot of what I read here is just positive reinforcement for negative behavior.
It’s not what’s going to help you. If what I wrote isn’t applicable to you, then I hope you find something that helps you with whatever it is you need.

Loneliness or frustration with the world isn’t cured by self-harm or cries for attention. We are not babies. The same methods we used when we were 3 years old will not work now. Loneliness is cured by reaching your hand out first. Not by asking for someone to reach out to you. Frustration is cured by accepting the world around you, for what it is. And STILL making the best of it. The reason the world rejects us, is because a lot of the time, we reject it.

My two cents.