i really dont know what to feel today, and i felt the same last night. i just really dont know what i feel, or if im feeling at all. i looked at myself in the mirror, and i just look blank. my eyes are blank my face is blank. i dont know if i should be worried or not. but i beleive i feel something, because sometimes i get a heavyness in my chest. almost like somethings missing. but it could always be my imagination.
so theres a rant ive wanted to do for a while and id really love your guyses thoughts on it if you have a moment.
and ill begin with the question: what are your thoughts on love?
now im generally curious because i hear some people rant about how love doesnt exist and how its not real, but later theyll be saying how there so depressed because this person doesnt love them. or how there so in love with this person.now i want honest answers.
because i beleive in love, i fantasies about love. i want to be loved, i want to love someone, and as of recently i do beleive i am in love. and i just want it to work out. im a clique because i want the love story you know, the ill always make you smile and never bring you down sort. the ill hold you close to me and never let you go. the kissing the tears away. the talking all the time because you just love eachothers company. the dancing around the living room laughing your asses off together. the cuddling at night because love is more then sex. the ill make you breakfast in bed because i like to do things for you. just the typical cliques we grew up with.
im stuck on it. i want it. and whats funny is thats what depresses me sometimes. because i dont have it.
i know i used to be a player of sorts just a year or so ago. but im sincerly ready to settle with someone. i havent dated anyone in over a year, and i did fine on my own. i dont have no urge to go sowe my wold outs with the world. i just want the one good girl, the one girl that will always be there. not the one night stand hi how r u-fucks like rabbits- oh seeya. i want the real deal. the long lasting one.
the im not here for the night im here for the long haul..
bleh i just really hope this works out, because shes the one i want.
anyway my rants mostly over, just read this if u can and let me know ur views on love.