school starts tomorrow. i want to bring my blade with me. if i do it, it will hurt the person i love. but i love doing it! the only thing i regret is hurting her. i wish i could take all the hurt away and have it all on me. first day back tomorrow maybe a bloody smiley on my skin is just what i need.
I’m beyond proud of you for still being alive.
You’re strong, beautiful/handsome and worth the stars and more.
Never think of yourself any less than amazing.
Whether it’s a good day or bad day, remember there can always be a better tomorrow.
Keep hope. Be inspirational. Change a person’s world. Be proud. Speak loud. Never let anyone bring you down.
Love with a passion. Chase your dreams. Smile. Laugh. Simply, believe.
Stay alive, friend.
I’m breaking. I’ve reached breaking point.
If I don’t talk to anyone about this, I will lose this battle. But I’m scared. I’m so scared to talk to anyone in my family. As much as they understand what I’m going through since they are going through the same thing, I doubt they do. (Not sure if that makes sense.) They will just tell me to tough it out like they always do.
Well… I’m so tired of being tough. I’m tired of having to pretend I am strong. I am so weak right now, I can hardly put up a fake smile. I can barely get […]
once upon a time
… there was a girl , soo confident one , passionate , strong , powerful , attractive , with a SMILE upon her face all the time … she was drawing on a wall … drawing a TREE and a CROW …
listening to Breaking Benjamin “Had Enough” song named …
a guy … we’re staring at her .. with an idiot look .. looked soo stupid to her ,, and she didn’t care …
then she had a cup of coffee with him and few friends .. he was a friend of hers .. he tried to impress her .. so he said he […]
If you had the one chance to meet your past self, may it be your 5-year old or 12-year old, or your last year self, which age would it be? And what would you tell him/her?
For me, if I could meet my 12 year old self, I would tell her,
“Be happy. There’s no need to be so sad… It won’t solve anything nor is it of any use. Smile, because everything will be just fine. When you’re as big as me you’ll look back and realize the beauty is much more meaningful compared to the pain.”
Hi I’m a 15-year-old girl and was very suicidal nearly the whole last year but I got over it and I want to tell my story to help those people who feel like I did some time ago.
It all started at primary school with some guys in my class bullying me. The bullying went on for almost 10 years in every class and school I went to because some of that bullies always where in the same class. Over that long time I became very insecure and also depressed. Depression really started when I was 12 or 13 and I started cutting and burning myself […]
I must not.
I must resist.
But it’s so hard.
Just one wouldn’t hurt, right ?
At most, I’ll be a little bit more hyper. A little more “happy”. It’ll be okay.
“Smile brighter” “laugh a little louder”
-cause nothing really matters-
Oh, the sound of the magical lord.
Smile. Take me, will I ever go dance.
Funky. Oh, brother. Sister. Oh, sister.
This entire net of space would of been my bus.
Here, where I will create a new order. A flower.
But my half decapitated truth and deformed ego.
Inflamed, hexed. The world is indeed a cold place.
One versus the world, I always hear the sound of the chain.
What can ever be the way, for me.
Oh, for the bounty.
Vowed, I swear it.
Take me to the land.
Take me to the land.
Take me to the land, oh.
I hate life. I hate people. I hate this world. I hate reality / real world / real life, they are all too boring/mundane for me, and I’ve found almost nothing that is interesting in this reality/real-life/real-world anymore, also in MOST people/humans!
the majority or MOST of human beings/people in this world I’ve found to be either a bunch of stupid, shallow, superficial, ignorant, selfish, rigid, stoic, lifeless, uninteresting, uncreative, and/or boring / mundane ones.
maybe that’s why this “reality” (or “real world” / “real life”) or our society currently is sooo f*cked up now almost beyond help!
with only VERY FEW exceptions of: real-GOOD, honest humans/people, real […]
He looked in her tear painted eyes
He saw past the lies
The I’m fines
All the things that were vile
He looked at in her eyes
Your not broken just bent
Everyone has their dents
Mine you have not seen yet
Tell me about a good place.
A place where I can be me
The weird, crazy me
The one with red stained hair
But my days seem to blend
Wake up, get out of bed.
look at myself in the mirror again.
Hate myself, love myself I don’t know what to do.
Get dressed, put on a mask.
Smile, and pretend
Wanting my world to end.
why can’t these people see?
I’m not the me I want to be
People speak, words that bring me down.
But it’s just another day.
Another day of feeling hated.
Another day of the same old, same old.
Why can’t […]
I hate this boring, bored reality / real life / real world, I hate this life, this LIMITED world, and I hate people/humans ..!!
Movies, books, video games, novels, comics, anime/manga, etc etc, basically human’s IMAGINATIONS is a hundred times FAR much more interesting than this very LIMITING reality / real-world / real-life here in this world!
and what’s even worse is that most (about 90%) of humans / people I meet & know everyday are mostly stupid, shallow, superficial, mundane/boring, money and profits and image driven only, ignorant,.. mostly human beings especially today these days are much more bad & hopeless ..!!
(there are -thankfully/luckily?- only FEW humans/people that I like, eg: the very creative/imaginative & ‘other-worldly’ artists who created/made all those awesome fantasy, sci-fi stories, novels, books, […]
It’s been 3 years since i last made a post on here about my depression. Let’s just say I’m the happiest I’ve really ever been. I coped with my depression by exercising and being healthy, doing so I lost 20 pounds in the process which I am happy about. When year 10 of school started I decided I would try something risky and I did. I tried out for the foreign exchange program to go overseas. With the risky decision I succeeded and am now going to Germany in July. And this is all because I found a way to cope with my depression and […]
I have posted on this subject before but wondered who new may be willing to share their despair and/or dying songs. Â I hope, intend to terminate my time here with a damn good soundtrack blasting into my ears.
Eddie Vedder – Guaranteed, Far Behind, Society (from Into the Wild soundtrack)
Jeff Buckley – Hallelujah
Green Day – 21 Guns
REM – Try Not To Breathe
REM- I Wanted to Be Wrong, Why Not Smile
Crowded House – Weather With You
Yo Yo Ma and Alison Krauss – Simple GiftsÂ
THANKS for any suggestions everyone, I appreciate it.
I started cutting myself when I was 11 years old, after my best friend die from cancer. My mom was everything to me, when she left I felt like there was no point in being happy when the person you love is gone now. With my mom I feel like im nothing with out her she was my everything. People ask how im doing all I have to do is put a FAKE SMILE on so that they dontsee right through me. WHAT IS LIFE ABOUT ANYMORE!!
I hide behind a smile, a fake self if you will. This self is the one I use when at school around friends who don’t know my secret and around family who will judge if they knew. This self has a smile, a retched smile that sickens me even to look. This smile makes me seem as if I’m fine, that nothing troubles me. However the smile may fade and my true self has shown, just a bit at least then I fear..I fear those who don’t know has seen my darkened colors then the smile appears again as something ‘funny’ happens and I realize […]
I hate pretending like I’m okay when every little thing reminds me of you.
I feel like a horrible person because I’ve tried finding someone new.
I cry myself to sleep at night and I’m afraid to turn off the light…
I’m afraid that I’ll see you, I usually do…
I miss everything about you…
I miss your eyes so blue…
I miss your smile and the light in your eyes,
I miss the way we talked all night…
I miss how our hands, mine so small compared to yours, still fit perfectly together…
I miss how you seemed so excited, when you found out […]
Faded smile. It can say a lot, or it can say nothing at all. As a kid you have a smile that just brightens everyone’s day. But as you get older you may still have that smile and it may still brighten everyone’s day but the one person who needs it the most is you and your smile doesn’t help you. Years go by, friends get lost, deaths appear, heartbreaks… Things that as a kid never existed. Soon we are shown that our lives are in our own hands. That we just as much as others can take it away just like that. And soon […]
I really miss that happy and funny smile
that laugh that come from the bottom of your heart.. now it’s different.. it’s a.. I don’t know what it is.. but nobody notice that..
sometimes I’m tired of getting drunk to feel that extremely happiness that I used to feel every second of my life.. it was always there.. that happiness was my best friend.. now I only have a few friends.. thousands of “Friends” and other thousands of haters (I think that fighting with them halp me to remember that happiness..)
I miss my smile..
Im will still waiting for that ***** because I’m tired […]