Here I am one year later. Why do I even try to kill myself.. Â Well, recently I haven’t really tried.. I’m bored of waiting to have an opportunity. I’m bored of wanting to die.. Most days are better then others and death seems too…. sigh.. death seems too what? too…. the same. Like everything on this place. Most of you guys want to die.. but what happens next? As long as you’re gone right.. What if there was no heaven or no hell. You’re just stuck in your coffin awake for eternity.. Would you regret.. Would you lose your mind? A month ago I had an opportunity but this question stopped me.. “What next?” AGH… I guess instead of trying to kill myself.. I guess I’ll go around teaching my new toy how to kiss and fuck… Nothing really to do any ways.. When I’m completely done. I guess ill have to wait a while to buy a gun.. then I’ll do it.. as for now, I will be the same depressed teen as I always am. Why don’t I buy a gun now? I’m under aged and I have a 5150. Most of you might know what that is… Not really sure what else to say.. I’m bored, I’m sick, I’m tired, and I’m losing my mind. Â The only things keeping me sane are Music, Masturbation, and Michael. The three M’s.
Until Next Time My Lovelies..
~Â Selbstmord
1 comment
Hey,
Things can change, you have to realize that … You might be amazed how much talking someone who know what they’re doing can make a difference. Please consider contacting someone, say at http://www.integralcounseling.org/ … I believe you can talk to people over the phone, possible over email, and if you don’t want to spend much money, they can certainly accomodate you. It’s not about pretending to feel better, it’s about actually working through this stuff. Just call! You have nothing to lose.