wanna die

My grama thinks that I dont aprisieat what my dad gives me but thats a l I do aprisieat but she keep saying Im not. My mother things Im stupid that I do everything wrong that Im lazy but is noI dont help a lot because everytime I do my mom fighs that I do it wrong. My dad was always there for me but my grama always say that i brain wash my dad so I dont talk that much with him anymore. I only had a special person in my life my best friend and started to be my love yes it was a girl she was alway there for me but know that I need her the most shes gone

In school everyone says that im ugly, satanic, weirdow, a freak

I try to ignore it but I cant

Im so lonelly right know,  everything I do is wrong im near thekitchen and there are some sicers, knife, pills and poisonI wanna try them all