I’m gonna be honest. I’m slowly falling apart but seems like I’m falling ever so quickly off of a never ending cliff. But I know it ends because soon I will hit the bottom. I can’t feel my body or succeed in anything I do. I’m a failure. I wrote a poem to maybe help you understand…
My friend Ana.
My friend Ana said I don’t need food
I’m gaining too much weight
She said sleep is for the worthy
So I wake early and go to bed late
My friend Ana said I’m too fat
Too fat for anyone to love me
She said to stop being who I am
And be who others want me to be
My friend Ana said I’m stupid
My brain doesn’t function right
She said I deserve to be punished
And she watches me cut at night
My friend Ana said I had no friends
Nobody will ever care
She said I should listen to her
She will always be there
I never thought it would end like this
My wrists soaking the white bandana I owe my last breath to my friend
My friend that I call Ana
5 comments
curious as to where the name Ana came from? or is that just your name? anyway i feel the same. the inner hatred is neverending
Ana is short for anorexia
I don’t think you should listen to Ana. She’s a pretty shitty friend IMO. Not a friend at all. Friends help you when you’re down, not make it worse.
If you want to lose weight, you should talk to a nutritionist. They can suggest a diet for you to follow that will help you attain your goal weight without starving yourself or becoming bulimic. You might also want to try exercising – if you can, talk to a physiotherapist, or look online/YouTube for workout regimes you can follow. Be careful not to overexert yourself if you are anorexic, as it can be damaging for your heart. (I speak from personal experience.)
She won’t always be there I hope, you are talented. I hope you make it through this, if only to make the world softer with words.
Thank you, it means a lot because writing is all I have (: