My life

I am a 17 year old male and for as long as I can remember have been good at everything. I am also pretty good looking but I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts and not for the usual reasons either. I honestly feel there is no point in life. To get old and die one day don’t sound to good to me. Not because I’m afraid of getting old because I see no point in working to take care of myself when ill just die anyway.  I consider my self  strange because I don’t wanna die and say the world is better with out me or some other bs because it probably isn’t I just sit and think to my self that there is no point to life if we die and like life I question everything else saying to my self what’s the point of this. In this world created by humans in a system of  government created by humans only some will succeed by doing insane things. My problem is I don’t see the point of living in a system created by other people and have there rules forced on me. Maybe I haven’t lived long enough to figure out life or maybe I just figured it out early and its not that I would like to die its that I would like for everything to stop I’d like to stop existing but who knows I might one day wake up with a reason to live like love or some other bs but for now ill sit around my house smoking weed listening to joey bada$$, Kendrick Lamar, and Shredding on my skate board down the streets of Montgomery Al. Ps. I did this all on my iPhone so sorry about the bad writing. -Skate Life forever