“OMG you’re sisters? You look nothing alike! She’s so skinny and pretty!â€
No one really realizes what they are saying before they say it and it’s usually followed by “I mean, you’re skinny, too, but just average. She’s soo skinny!â€
I smile and nod, “oh I know, she is very skinny!†like it has no effect on me, but each time it kills me a little more. Each time I cut a few more calories and I promise to be smaller than her. I was, once. Then everyone convinced me I was sick so i fought to get better. I used to wonder all the time, why is she allowed to be skinny without being sick? I don’t know the answer to that question, all I know is that I’m not good enough yet.
7 comments
To be honest with you the myth that men prefer stick figure girls has been debunked several times over….If my wrist has a larger circumference than your waist most men would find that revolting….come up with your own standard of what is pretty….now of course if you are extremely overweight compared to her then you must understand that most people don’t find obesity attractive….but I mean you need to realize you are you and she is her…..competing with her is stupid because you don’t need to ….even if the truth is she is prettier and thinner ….so what?
I second what PainNlife has said; I’ve had girlfriends and friends who are girls that would insist they were either overweight or not slim enough to fit a cocktail dress/bikini/whatever else you women love to flaunt. I tell ya, convincing a girl that she is not overweight has got to be one of the most well fought battles if you can convince her she’s not. I’m sure it’d be quite a spectacle if I were to convince you in person, huh? =)
Okay, “…but just average”. I emphasize this to point out that, if you’re the average in terms of weight, then this other girl is something much worse. Yes, I appreciate you’ve gotten better (and had a relapse of sorts) but to compete with someone who is obviously only tryna make things harder on themself is downright stupidity.
I know you don’t want to be at her level, okay? But you’ve gotta fight through what others say, intentional or otherwise.
I am 20 years old, weigh 78.4 kgs (172 lbs), with a height of 183cm and BMI of 23.4, That’s fairly average for me, and it took work to actually maintain my body in the healthy range, especially with people hounding me that I was too skinny at one point.
Stop competing with that other chick, become an image in your own right, not what someone else sees as perfect; half the time, there blind as bats anyway.
Do take care, and keep us updated.
at the end of the day it comes down to the old saying of *beauty is in the eye of the beholder* some people will find you attractive and others won’t. some people like fat girls, other people like skinny girls. some people like tall girls, others like small girls. some people like black girls, others like white girls, blah blah blah. but what i got from your post was that this goes deeper than that, in the sense of what YOU perceive to be attractive. if you have issues with how you look then don’t try to palm them off on innocuous comments made by other people.
Thanks everyone. I’m not exactly “extremely overweight,” I weigh less than 120 and I’m 5’5″. I know that weight doesn’t even mean that much, but I obsess over it. People like me the way I am, in fact people like me a whole lot more when I eat and when I’m not consciously trying to lose weight. My weight is important to me though… I feel like the skinnier I am, the better I am.
I know exactly what you mean… I’m underweight but I still struggle and feel like I should lose more. Then I also want to gain weight, but whenever I do, I try to lose it again. It’s a vicious cycle.
Yes exactly. Last year I was recovering and at my all time highest weight, but I was so happy. Weight didn’t matter to me and eating was just natural. I miss that so much. Now every meal is a war. I hate myself so much when I eat. I can’t look at myself without thinking how fat and disgusting I am. I used to weigh less than 100 and at the time I didn’t think I was skinny at all, I still wanted more, but looking back at pictures I looked really sick and it’s sad that I didn’t know.
I like eating but I don’t have much food at home. I don’t mind because at least I won’t overeat. I probably look sick too but I don’t really care anymore. I’ll try to gain more but I wish it wouldn’t go to my hips – that’s my main problem. And I like being able to wear size 0-2, and size 3 jeans (U.S. measurements).