I’m new of the page, and I wanted to start by asking people here, if, for them, all of this feelings of depression, the despair, the death wish, had a beginning, that’s to say, some kind of catalyst that started to bring your life down, to the point where ir became unbearable…
When I was 6 years old, I got sexually abused by a guy who used to work for my parents. I was too little to understand what had happened, but still I told my mother ALL OF IT, and she just dismissed it with a casual “You must have dreamed (dreamt?) it”. Obviously, when I got older I finally understood what happened to me, and maybe that’s when all of this started… Feeling like a disgusting person, a tainted woman, crying till I fell asleep, over-eating till I puked, and then eating again… When I confronted my mother about it, she told me she didn’t want me to go through all the trauma of being examined by countless people, and having to answer awkward question, and told me to get over it…
Do people really think is that easy??? I’ve been dealing with depression for the past 11 years, and it really doesn’t seem that I can “PULL MYSELF TOGETHER AND GET OVER IT” even now…
I just wished that guy had killed me after he was done with it, so I wouldn’t have to be here, feeling like trash, cutting myself till I look like a Christmas Ham, and wanting to commit suicide…
6 comments
Wife leaving me, i tried to end it all one night.
However now I recently learned what a filthy whore she was, so I am better off.
AND I now have a very special and beautiful girl in my life, beyond what I could haver ever asked for. 🙂
In fact, I would say she was sent from heaven and I have a real angel 🙂
I’m sorry for everything you had to go through… doesn’t sound like an easy situation to overcome, and in your case i’d say it was clearly that even which triggered everything… i do think there is a predisposition to depression in most “cases” but someone with no disposition for it can always develop depression if things get to rough or they go through a traumatic event… so i’d say i can be any combination of factors (in my case it’s predisposition + situations).
You’ve got post traumatic stress disorder. You can still report him. It’s actually more likely to secure a conviction in historic abuse cases because there is no motive for the complainant to make it up. When there is evidence to suggest something happened but it went unreported it adds greater weight than if the allegations occured now. While that person is out there you’ll find it more difficult to get over.
The more people who know and support you helps. The more stories you read about from people with similar experiences helps.
I was born one cold, blustery day, and everything was downhill from there.
I’m sorry to hear about what happened to you. Guys like the one you’re talking about should rightly be rotting behind bars in a prison, with a cellmate who likes to boink them every night while calling them Shirley. I wish there was something anyone could say that would take away the pain you’re left with, though I doubt there is.
actually is not as simple as that, these kind of cases are invalidated after certain time has passed, and after so many years is impossible to open a case. Not many people know, but my parents, and perhaps my brothers, but they seem to have opted to “forget about it”… oh, If it was just that easy for me…
It’s nice to know you have managed to overcome your depression and suicidal feelings, I’m envious, although I must assume it wasn’t as easy as it sounds…