I thought moving away from my problems would make everything better. Moving away was always my go to option if things got too bad, and they did, and now I’m worse off than I was before. What the hell is that? My life is the best it’s ever been and I can’t enjoy. I should be happy. Why aren’t I happy? Why don’t I feel like appointments with a psychologist are doing anything? For the amount of feelings I have they confuse the crap out of me. I wish I could stop caring, but I can’t, and that sucks. I’m so unappreciative, so many people have it worse than me and even if it wasn’t for that, my life is fine now. So why do I feel so guilty? So sad. So hollow.
1 comment
Guilt usually happens when you know you’ve done wrong.
Maybe “running away” wasn’t the best answer… even if you felt it was necessary, in order to preserve yourself.
Maybe there are some sort of “amends” you could make, even if your only intention is to assuage your own guilt and forgive yourself.
Plus, the “guilt trip” is a widely used tactic, and is often employed in situations where the “trippee” has done something that the “tripper” doesn’t like, but can’t control or stop the “trippee” from doing. So there’s that.
Sometimes, people want you to feel guilty when you shouldn’t. Sometimes, you feel guilty because you should. Maybe you can figure out which one of those is more you.