I feel numb to all happiness surrounding me. I smoke pot daily, just so I feel a thrill from this life, and a little escape from every day’s crap. I need a bigger trip. Like mush or acid. Or love. I’ve been waiting for someone to love for 17 years now. All I got was hurt and scared. I just need to kiss and hug and comfort someone.Talk and cry with them. Run and laugh and live with them. All I have is a broken sister, an overwhelmed mother and a hole in my heart. I feel so empty and even tho I love myself, I do need some exterior love, is that too much to ask from this shitty life? Really?
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Not too much to ask, but extremely difficult to get an answer. From my experience anyway.
I tend to… shy away from engaging in any sort of transmission of love. I don’t feel it anymore. I have been in love, I have loved and had this same thing reciprocated to me. Was it worth the effort? Of course. Am I better off because of these experiences? Indeed I am. But there’s always the emotional and mental toll that ‘love’ can and will inflict upon you.
You love yourself. That’s outstanding and most people can’t even manage that (I sure as hell can’t). You’re already half way there. Now comes the journey of seeking out that other companion, in time you will find them and whatever you do; don’t let them go.
Well, at least until you’ve gotten a feel for them anyway.
I’m always asking myself if it’s worth living, because right now, I only live for someone I have never met, someone that will make me a new person with their love. If nothing happens soon, I won’t have any reasons to live anymore. I’m not saying I am dying to have boyfriend or something like that, I am craving a sign that life is still pure and lovable and that being a human isn’t such a bad thing. I am dying for people to be nice to each other and for earth to bloom the way it did before once again.
“I am dying for people to be nice to each other and for earth to bloom the way it did before once again.”
That’s never going to happen. Trust me, I know that will never happen as long as there are war mongering bastards like me around, only the dead will know peace from this sorrowful life. Your vision is beautiful, I fear it shall never come to fruition.
Trust me I know, that’s what saddens me the most. The only way I can help this earth is by removing the load of another living human off it’s back.
You sound like me. Yeah, it seems to be too much to ask.
I can’t imagine being close to another person, being a broken waste of space among the wasteland that this planet is.
tbh I think a lot of us need that love and comfort from others, but we are too oblivious to their approach. Either that or we choose not to believe that they truly care & so love in non-existence in our lives.
So we tend to push away a little from others, because we know that we may get too comfortable & so we pretend that we don’t need that “shit”. But deep down we do
Disdain that which you cannot have For giving it attention only makes it stronger(48 laws of power)…. either way ull have to deal with it later in life through therapy and broken relationships. If you need to now, protect yourself at all cost.
I have given up on love. Its just rubbish. I’ve never met a girl that really loved me its always sex or they want to spend my money. To most men just having sex with no strings attached is perfect. Not me I needed companionship. Will never get it though. Too damaged emotionally and also lost my six year old daughter two years ago so I’d say I’m pretty fucked up.