Putting on a show

She felt alone inside her mind. It was her darkness that consumed her, she never had the switch to turn on the light. It’s that kind of gleam, that is seen in the eyes of the happy. She craved for it, ever since was 11 when she realize everything is a mess. Happiness has been her birthday wish every year. On her 16 birthday, she didn’t wish for a car, it was to be happy like before. Her friends never knew that she was depressed and suicidal. It was like she was in her own play. She does her hair, makeup and costume to act like she is happy. It was out on everyday. She had a little amount of real friends, because she became distant. She didn’t want a Prince Charming, or human anti-depressant. She couldn’t have someone to help her from her own thoughts. She would just push them away. She liked sleeping because it took her away from everything, her emotions about herself and the self hatred. It’s hard to run away from the negativity that coming from yourself.