I feel numb from my head to my toes. It hurts to breath, to wake up every morning and realize I’m still alive. I’m sad or maybe even just a little bit depressed. I cant want to stand but I don’t know how much more I can take….
My friends try to cheer me up, but sometimes… It just isn’t enough. After all
“Happiness is fleeting.”
I honestly don’t know what to do anymore… I don’t know why I’m still breathing….
I try so hard to improve but then I always end up failing… I can never stop being a failure, a stupid wide eyed disappointment…
I want everything to end, but for some reason I can’t bring myself to end my pain.
Is it because I’m waiting for someone to save me from self destructing?
I need help, I know I do. That is the main reason why I joined this website… Please… I don’t know what to do anymore. Every time I stand I always end up falling ass flat on the ground.
Sincerely,
Lost little girl (19 yr. old)
14 comments
Relying on someone to save you from self destruction is a recipe for disaster, it is unpredictable and not reliable and if your relationship with that person were to deteriorate or dissipate you will be in an even worse situation. It is absolutely good if you seek someone who can support and lend care and compassion to you, but you need to have a self erected foundation to stabilize you. Your friends that attempt to comfort you, perhaps their words are not as effective because you don’t have a personal, intimate relationship with them? You should try to get closer to them, once you recognize that they genuinely care about you and are willing to support you it may affect you much better, it’s hard to tell pseudo words from genuine when you don’t have that trust and retain a superficial relationship. You can do this. Rock on 🙂
I’m just really confused, I’m trying to stand but when I succeed it only lasts for a few days. I’m a failure at almost everything I do. I’m some one studying psychology to help people and I can’t even help myself. How will I be able to help others, when I myself feel so down? But I really am grateful for your reply and support. To be honest I didn’t think anyone would would comment. Thank you for taking the time to read what I posted.
i’m from tasmania, most of us are from america and some from other countries and although we all have different problems we all hurt similarly, it just goes to show that everyone in the world, whether you’re from the opposite end of the world or from around the corner, we all hurt some time in our life, some more then other’s. so your not alone, there’s always someone out there whether it be over the internet or in a psychologist office, there’s always someone who will listen.
It’s sort of hard trying to find a psychologist to listen to you with out having them insert some of their morals into the conversation. My teachers are supposed to be masters in the field of psychology and sometimes not even they can understand how I feel. They try to, but still nope. Thank you for your comment tho’… I appreciate it. 🙂
haha thank you for commenting on my comment and they probably don’t know how you feel because they havn’t gone through it themselves and that’s why you could help people better then other psychologist, because you’ve been through it yourself and if you need a reason to keep going then keep going to help other’s, don’t turn and run from pain or hurt because the more you can relate to other people’s pain the better you can help them.
Do you have any suggestions as to how I can lessen the pain?
some cut, some take panadol as a placebo, some put a metaphorical mask on around people (hence my username) and there are some others but I can’t remember them and actually minimizing the pain is hard without hurting yourself in a different way. there are some basic psychological tricks you can use but they take a while.
I’ve tried cutting but I can’t do it as much as I used to anymore, due to the fact my mom is keeping a close eye on me (she doesn’t know how I feel and doesn’t know I cut myself). Wait so Panadol really works?
if you believe it does then yes, if you don’t think it works then it wont but if you use too much then it’ll hurt you physically and I use it as directed on the label and it’s alright but I use to wait until I was “better”.
Thank you very much for your input 🙂
anytime. thank you for sharing with us. Have Fun xx.
I know the feeling. As I write this, I lay here in bed, windows closed, on this beautiful sunny day, waiting for the pain to pass. I know it will…eventually. It always does. But not forever…it’ll come back with a vengeance. It’s a horrible way to live. I can’t take much more
I like your screen name. I feel like my soul is trapped in this prison of my body and it just wants to be free, but I don’t know how to let it go.
It just never fully leaves us alone… I guess we all have our breaking points.