Up to day five of starving myself with a bread roll for breakfast and a couple vegetables for dinner. I’ve lost around 1kg per day since I started. I’m taking stimulants during the day to keep my metabolism up and appetite down. I take sedatives at night so the hunger pains don’t keep me awake. I don’t have the energy to exercise like I did before and I find myself struggling a little bit at work in spite of the stimulants, but I’m a third of the way there. Only a couple more weeks, I should be able to shed 10 kgs if I keep this up.
I don’t think this constitutes an eating disorder, but I’ve been trying to lose weight with little success for ages, so I decided to do the only thing guaranteed to work. If I don’t eat, I’m guaranteed to lose weight. Otherwise, I’d starve to death with fat on my body and whoever heard of that happening?
The idea is to keep going till I get back down to 70 or 65 kgs, then gradually build up my protein intake and start going to the gym again. With any luck, my weight will increase again, but with muscle and not fat. That’s the plan anyway.
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Remember – it’s not about dieting. It’s about nourishing and giving your body the premium fuel it needs to not only get you going but keep the machine in a serviceable state.
Other than that, you’re doing a pretty good job. I like how you referenced the metabolism – outstanding. Most folks tend to forget that. I’m porky at 80-odd kilos right now but…I still look slim-ish (if my old platoon commander saw me, he’d laugh hysterically).
Best of luck to you though, I do hope you achieve this plan of your’s.
I did this once, though not entirely voluntarily. They put a tube into my heart chamber to deliver nutrients. No matter how I wanted to kill myself, I get why they did that “to” me. Please be careful!
What? Why?
What happened?
I am a former anorexic, and IMO, what you are describing is an eating disorder.
When I was 17 I stopped eating – just like you are describing – just because someone made a rude comment about my weight. The appropriate response should have been “fuck you” but instead, I stopped eating. I just quit.
At first, everyone thought it was cool because I was losing weight. Even my parents thought it was great. So naturally, I did not start to eat again because people finally were accepting me. (Incidentally, I was a size 9 when I stopped eating… I was hardly overweight.) I kept going and got down to 87 pounds at 5 foot 5. My hip bones protruded. I was in children’s clothing because no adult clothes fit me any more. My hair started to fall out, my skin turned yellowish grey, my eyes were sunken in, I could barely stay awake and alert, and I was freezing cold all of the time. I thought I looked great, but I was so damn sick physically that I had no clue what was happening in the world. The only reason I stopped was because my hair was falling out so severely. Had most my hair not come out, I suppose I would have kept going and would have lost my life. So, because of my hair, I started eating again. Crazy reason, huh?
Now, nearly 30 years later, I am certainly overweight… no two ways about it. But, I learned from the anorexia that it had NOTHING to do with my weight and EVERYTHING to do with how much I detested myself. I hated my body and my life, and I wanted control back. I had no control – I was being molested and had been for years, my family was controlling, I felt trapped and useless and ugly and just wanted to die. Not eating was the only control I had. I’ve done so much better with accepting myself as I am – fat and all. I’d rather be fat and accept myself than crucify myself for my weight. Now I focus on eating the best I can for me and trusting that I know what my body really needs.
You may wish to check up on what starvation does on a physical level. Your body will go into survival mode and when you do eat again, your body will try to store a lot more fat for the next time you “starve”. It’s not a good cycle to be in, and in fact, can cause a lot of weight gain in the long run. (I am not a doctor, but I am speaking from experience and from reading extensively about dieting). If you are going to eat, as someone else said, focus on good nutrition. But bottom line, trust your body and yourself, IMO. You instinctively know what you need to lose weight and nourish yourself at the same time. Trust that feeling.