I betrayed a good friend of mine. While in a drunken state, I kissed her ex. Today my worst fears came alive. She found out and now she hates me.
I now feel that everyone knows. Im broken beyond repair. I don’t know who I am anymore.
I have no purpose anymore. Before my purpose was loyalty. Now I no longer have that.
I don’t deserve to live.
I no longer have a reason to be here.
5 comments
Everybody does things they regret. It happens. If it didn’t, the word “regret” wouldn’t exist. One option is to apologize, which you probably have, and let a little time pass. In some respects, it’s a learning experience for you because you now know a little more about your alcohol limits. There’s nothing wrong with learning from our mistakes.
Even if everyone knows, they aren’t perfect. There are probably things they have done that went public. Things happen in life. The best we can do is try our best. You’re definitely not broken beyond repair. If anything, you’ve learned a little bit. Set a high standard for yourself but don’t make the bar impossible to reach. You definitely deserve to live.
Welcome to the board, by the way. I’ve found a lot of support here. It’s a good place to find people who understand.
Is their breakup recent? If the guy is her ex (as opposed to a current relationship) you haven’t betrayed anyone. It’s ok for you to feel bad about it, and offering her an apology is fine, but she needs to get over it too. Don’t let yourself become a scapegoat.
Is there something about this particular situation that makes this a more grievous offense than it otherwise would be?
It sounds as if you simply made an error in judgment. I understand it’s painful to have your friend upset with you, but to say that you don’t deserve to live is extremely harsh. Speak with her and express your regret about what happened. I’m sure the two of you can patch things up.
L4Y
(L4Y@cogeco.ca)
Trust me when I say if all you did is kiss him while you were drunk you’re doing something right. If your friend doesn’t forgive you then you need new friends.
Like everyone else is saying, it was a mistake and we all make mistakes. Some of our entire lives are mistakes, so you’re lucky you got off with a kiss. But I can see you’re in a touchy situation. Your friend is very emotional about it, and that changes the rules on forgiveness. Funny I just saw a movie last night where a drunk girl kisses her best friend’s ex, and she later confesses (to stop her friend from getting back with the jerk) and they get into a big fight. In the movie she ends up saving her best friend from getting carjacked and everything’s cool after that. Hm….. I don’t suppose you can save your friend from getting carjacked?