I’ve been in treatment for suicide thougths in a klinik. But since i stopped i felt the same… The same thougths, the thougths I was supposed to be saved from. So why is they still here? I don’t understand! Everyone thinks im “normal” again, my family. So everyday I walk around with a fake smile. Maube everyone belives it, but the darkness often take over my thougths, and suicide seems like the only way.
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Do you have a therapist? Are you on meds? If you were diagnosed with major depressive disorder or any kind of chronic mental illness, these thoughts will most likely always be with you. Battling mental illness is a constant cycle but meds and therapy help for some people. Some learn to live with it, it’s just a part of their lives like breathing air. And others don’t. If you want help, I suggest losing the fake smile and letting people know what is really going on. I know family members are sort of quick to try and forget you were ever suffering. Ignorance is bliss, I suppose.