hey folks, wow, what a crazy, emotional day.sun has gone down,the ex has left, and the anxiety has eased somewhat. we were able to get the big stuff out, and now can cocentrate on the little stuff. the important stuff is safe. how sweet the quiet. how sad the heart.it was good. my son and his girlfriend came and helped. the ex did not bother to tell me that they were coming. totally lost it when i saw him. he was great and really enjoyed having them here. embarrased of course.no self confidence or esteem. basically feeling pretty low. but also relieved. some of the pressure has eased. i have thought of you all day my friends. i did not want you to worry. please dont. i will not suicide today. thats kind of a dailey mantra for me now.damn, body is in that vibrating mode. we can go in the gutter with that if you want, but i really need it to stop. once again i want to thank all of you.my close friends and those i dont know. i love all of you, and care very much for your saftey. in trying to help you, i end up helping me. i am hopeful that my words can help and assist you , as yours do for me. thank you again and peace
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11 comments
TC that’s great that you survived the day… I can’t imagine how emotionally exhausting it must’ve been. You’ve been such a positive force around here, I’m glad we’re able to give back!
Sounds like a really stressful day — glad you were able to hang in there.
thank yall so much. that means so much.
I really hope you can keep hanging in there tc13, it’s good our words are helping you, yours are certainly helping me, to know you’re getting help makes me feel relieved, it makes me want to keep trying myself.
* Trying to keep going myself, (not trying to commit suicide), thought I’d better clear that up.
Do you have any idea how much of a person you would need to be to get through today? You rocked it and worked through it and that is something everyone finds challenging. Awesome job in being alive and don’t you dare sell you’re self short in how amazing you are!
ya tc, your son brought over his gf? awesome! thats something every father is grateful to see.. cause when a son has a gf, it means hes happy.. if not “happy” atleast not lonley! 🙂 if you ever think of suicide, think of your sons happy relationship
wow, tearing up again, thanks for that tc, you keep making me cry. And the responses too. What a great supportive bunch of people here. I just told an online friend, that the only friends I have, are online friends. I think that’s true for a lot of us. Where would we be w/out our online friends who love us.
tc…hang in there, we’re routing for you. xoxo
without my friends on sp, i know where i would be. yes, they are pretty much the only ones i have.
I think being online friends is kind of like the way animals love humans. Unconditionally, w/out concern for looks, social status, money, etc. We get to the soul and love deeply.
“Unconditionally, w/out concern for looks, social status, money, etc.”
Yes! I find the anonymity to be so much better, in many ways, than traditional interaction. Anonymity is the great equalizer — we’re forced to set aside our biases, and we can’t make snap judgements about gender, looks, income, and all the things we normally can’t help but factor into our initial assessments.
of course, being human, we can find other things to make snap judgements about, and communicating via printed word has its own challenges, but electronic communication definitely has its benefits 🙂