Right now, my coping mechanisms are overeat, drink, pray to God that I don’t wake up when I finally get to sleep, and the best so far is rationalizing suicide and coming up with an exit plan. Work doesn’t want me anymore, so I’m not even productive. With a Plan B, it is extremely relieving to finally have SOME control over what is going on with my body. That’s my best coping mechanism.
Does anyone have better ideas for coping?
6 comments
if you figure one out let me know. damn doctor probably wouldnt even give me pain pills if i broke my neck
I know what you mean. 🙂
I don’t have any good coping mechanisms. It’s all just coping in the end. I’ve been dealing with chronic pain everyday for 20 years now. No pain meds. No medical marijuana. Nothing. Just a lot of ‘grin and bear it.’ My joy and zest for life exited when the pain showed up. I haven’t slept much since my back injury and I’m exhausted. So tired. I really don’t think I can go on much longer living with this kind of pain. I’ve also added many more injuries in the last 6 years and this has left me feeling overwhelmed. I just don’t know what to do anymore?
As far as your situation goes, first off, what kind of injury caused your chronic pain? Next, how long have you had this chronic pain?
I have heard about so many amazing people tolerating tremendous amounts of pain their whole lives. I don’t know how they do it. Yes. The whole thing is exhausting. Check back with your doctor. There’s been a lot of advancement in spinal care. Or, change doctors.
I got electrocuted, a few years ago, and it left me with radiating pain in my neck and shoulder. I spend a lot of days wishing I died that day. Doctor’s spent a lot of time telling me they can’t fix me, and I will probably have this pain for the rest of my life. The more activity I do, the more pain I get. If I sit in a recliner all day, every day, it’s tolerable. I have a family to support, I like working and feeling productive.
So, I’m sure you’ve seen the pain cycle chart where you go from pain to stress and finally leads you back to more pain. So, the idea of killing myself is a huge relief of stress because I think, finally I can do something about it. So, If I can come up with a better coping mechanism then that, I think my kids would appreciate it.
Sorry to hear about your accident. I imagine that would be a very stressful situation, having a family to support and being physically disabled. I am fortunate in one respect as I don’t have a wife or children who are depending on me. My accident happened at age 22, before I had the chance to get married or start a family.
I am familiar with the pain cycle you speak of. Chronic pain has elevated my cortisol levels to very unhealthy levels. This has lead to a greatly lowered immune system. Excessive cortisol levels have contributed to my chronic insomnia as well. Less sleep = More pain/stress. More pain/stress = less sleep. Less sleep = impaired healing. It’s a vicious cyle.
I don’t have a doctor at this point and I can’t afford ObamaCare. I’m not sure how much good they would do anyway. I have permanent nerve damage. I’ve tried the usual alternative stuff like chiropractic, massage therapy, inversion therapy, supplements, etc. In the end, they are all band-aid approaches that have provided very short-lived relief and are expensive. I would be willing to do back surgery at this point. I’ve known many people that came out worse because of surgery but I don’t have much to lose at this point. Also, most surgeons will not do surgery on people with thoracic disc injuries. Thoracic spine surgeries are complex with many risks involved and most surgeons are simply not willing to take the risk. Most of all, with no insurance I can’t afford surgery. I would be looking at a $60-100,000 bill. I’ve got other injuries (hernia, broken ribs, torn sacroiliac joint, etc) that need surgery also but once again, no money. I’ve been turning down lots of gigs over the last few years as my pain levels have increased. Suicide does seem like an option now. For a long time I thought I might be able to heal myself but instead things have gotten worse since 2009. I have a lot of things I still want to accomplish in life but living with this kind of pain makes me wonder if it’s really worth it to continue on? I don’t know.
One thing that helps me is laughter. I watch comedy movies or comedians. Going for a walk is helpful (as long as I don’t overdue it). Focusing on my breathing is beneficial (especially when I notice my pain levels starting to escalate). Hope this helps.
First off, I read recently that doctors found a way to turn off a part of the brain for untreatable, long-term pain. Of course it’s brand new technology so it’s still experimental but seems to be very successful-so there might be hope for people like yourselves here.
Secondly I’ve experienced severe back pain on and off, sciatica, I once had a terrible flu and felt like I was going to die, had pain all over my body. From the sciatica I still don’t have full control over my right foot when I walk, it’s not noticeable to anyone but me but I lost about 5-10% of my muscle control and I believe it’s the unconscious portion-fortunately I have no residual pain.
But the point I was trying to make was that I’m impressed that you people have been able to endure so long with the pain. If I had to live with severe back pain, sciatica or anything that would keep me from leading a normal life, I would’ve very seriously contemplated ending it a long time ago-if I knew the pain could never be stopped.
While I still have memories of my back pain and sciatica, it’s nowhere close to the actual experience. Also the immobility-I’m a fairly active person and could not stand to be an invalid or forced to lie around all day. So ya after a couple of months of no improvement, I’d have to end my life if the pain was incurable. My life is bad enough without having to deal with long term medical problems/pain on top of it…then the positive reasons to live quickly disappear, at least for me. Some people can put up with a lot, but my question is why bother.