Friendships never last.

When push came to shove, and I found that most of my friends left me. It seemed like they had left me to die.

I will never forgive some of them for leaving me when I needed someone. I felt so alone already, and when they left, I fell into a deeper depression than I was already in.

I guess I’m writing this to tell the truth. Most friendships don’t last. I was friends with someone for 11 years, and as soon as high school came around, everything changed for good. We drifted apart, as people do, and became different people.

We don’t talk anymore. There are still rumours and gossip and drama that I can never escape. Maybe it will follow me around forever.

But, I can’t just blame people, to try to forgive them. I have to forgive myself. I have to be willing to step up to the plate for my own actions, I have to be able to know when I am doing something wrong. Forgiving myself has been a long road, it’s hard. Because the more you pin point the problems, the more it comes back to you.

You can’t hold grudges on people forever. People make mistakes. They hurt you, they leave you, and god do I know, it hurts. It hurts physically and emotionally, but, you have to move on, you have to be able to take the first step to recovery. It isn’t easy, and nothing ever is, but you have to have the will power to get up and get out of the dark place you are in.

We can do this, even if it means we loose people we love.