I came here to get help .. so please no negative comments . Feel free to share your stories with me , I’m open to anything but , here’s mine ..
Its crazy . It hurts . It makes you feel so insane & lonely . You loving someone you know you’ll never have a chance with . What’s worse is never telling the person how you feel . When you constantly think of him more than yourself . You cry sometimes when you come to reality , when it all hits you .. it’ll never happen . Stop being irrational . Don’t be stupid . But you can’t stop . So that’s when you break down . Crying until you cry yourself to sleep . Your eyes bloodshot . The next day you see him . Your very impatient the anticipation is killing you . You day dream about all of these scenarios . You go to see him . Its even better . The little time you two have together are amazing . He looks into your eyes , make you smile . He makes your heart beat & your eyes glisten . Then times up . You have to end your happiness . You say your last goodbyes until the next time you two see eachother . You go home , lay in bed . Then all you do is think of him . Always . You even dream of him . Theres not one thing you don’t love about him . You adore him . & it fucking kills you . In your mind you try to convince yourself that you have a chance . Then theres that little reality check again .. letting you know to be real . Stop living in your own fantasy . You just want to tell him how you feel . You want to break down & open up . Tell him that you love him unconditionally . Will the time come to tell him ? Sure , it will . But you won’t . You’ll be to nervous . You’ll be so afraid to get hurt by rejection . You just don’t know what to do . Every second is torture . You become more & more infatuated with him . & you know that he doesn’t think about you one bit . So your scattered in pieces . Broken . Abandoned . All you want is him . All those times you think he feels the same way & those breathless moments aren’t what you think they are . Theres a million reasons why I should give up .. but the heart wants what it wants .. im at a loss for words . The only thing I find reasonable is ending it all . The craziness . The pain . The tears , the drinking ..