I feel nothing. But at the same time I feel everything. Basically all I can think about is committing suicide. I just want to disappear. I want it all to be gone. I don’t understand what goes on in my mind. I want to be gone. I’m sorry mom and dad. I know I said I would never kill myself I just have to. You want me to be happy and by doing this I will be happy. It’s not your fault. I know I should be greatful for all that I have and I am but all those things don’t make me not want to kill myself. I’m just do damn empty. I really hate myself. Everybody always leaves me. And I know some people love me but I don’t love myself. And what’s the point of going on when you’re only living so other people won’t be sad when you kill yourself?
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To me disappearing is not the only solution you’re still thought about when you’re up in those pearly gates being asked is this the only solution if so good luck. If you can think of getting through this and finding at least a simple solution that is great. But its not always thought of as easy