I’ve been a very sensitive person, who loved other people very much.
I was always ready to help them, to support them by listening them.
I realized that people uses me like a diposable tissue, throwing me away when I stop to be useful to them.
I realized that I can open my heart to other people, but they never open their heart to me.
I realized that I can help other people, but when I am the one who needs help, nobody is there, neither the person I’ve helped, neither the other person.
I stopped helping, listening, or socializing, it hurts too much.
I realized I’ve never met a good person. People are not good.
I believed once in friendship, and I considered a friend as important as a lover.
But people have only friends because they can take some advantage.
Anyway, I never had friends. I may have considered some people like friends, but I realized I’ve never been something to anyone.
I don’t like people anymore.
I would need help in life, I never had families or friend to help me. I have been completely alone since I am 14. Alone in this world, my mother never knew when I was not sleeping in my home. When I was going back at home the day after, she didn’t know I was not at home, because she didn’t care. Maybe she has too much problem herself, but it’s the same thing.
I would need a little help to be better, but I know that people are not interested in doing good thing in other people than themselves. So, in this world with no love, no help, friendship that is only an empty word, it’s better to go.
Do you think like me?
I’ve never liked people why dont you you like people anymore?
Sorry, it deleted my story, I rewrote it. You can read now.
its okay and thanks
You are lucky to have never liked people, it’s better, because I had to learn to not love them to protect myself, I was hard. How do you feel about other people? Why don’t you like them?
im a very shy person i had a couple friends but they completely crushed me. people have tried to get close to me but soon tey learn im not that intresting. im trying to find someone who wont give up on me.
yea i think alot like you dont ave many friends because there the ones i had were fake and used me. you say your mom doesnt pay attention and im really sorry to hear that my parents dont pay much attention to me ether. you’re not alone find some trustworthy friends and family to love you.
You can’t find family. I have no dad, no brothers, no sisters, no cousins, and I don’t want to see my mother anymore, because she always had been hating me. A therapist told me “Why is your mother jealous of you?”. I think I can figure why, and as a result, she tried very hard to achieve this goal: being right when she says I’m nothing but a shit, and people should admire her, because she has a lot of courage for being the mother of a big shit like me.
When I had friends, she looked in my stuff to find the phone numbers, and called my friends to say awful things about me. She hoped my friends to be disgusted of me. She made that 3 or 4 times. Each time, my “friends” said: your mother called me, I don’t know why, I don’t know her, she told me that you are not a good person.
She made the same at school, with my teachers, and with my bosses.
She is probably very happy now, because I am alone, and if I kill myself, she will say:
“Hey, people, I told you my daughter was crazy, so I am a very courageous woman”.
I have a therapist but it didnt help. there has to be areason she hates you
Why do you think you are not interesting?
I’m not interesting myself, I can deduce it from other people behaviour, but I don’t know why.
If your therapist doesn’t help, you have to change your therapist. You can change several times, until you have the good one. Therapist is like a lover, you have to choose the one you like.
She hates me because she has been anorexic, and when she was pregnat she get some weight because of me. She always told me how a pregnant woman seemed disgusting to her. She hates me also because my grand-father loved me very much, and she was very jealous, because she though my grand-father loved me more than her. So I was very much hated, but I’m sure she never realized that she hated me, it’s not conscious.
I feel the same way all the time. Look, I live with my mom and her best friend. But they always favor my moms best friends daughter. When they found out I cut, they beat me. I have had friends that left the knife in my back. I had a boyfriend that took it out, stitched it up, let it heal, then stab me back in the same place. I feel alone here and most time I wanna die. So I understand completely
If they can’t love you, forget them. I forgot my mother, she is nothing for me now, I have NO mother.
Been there, and i go back from time to time. I still like to believe that not all people are the same and somewhat believe in the idea that everyone can be good to others if they want, but at times it does seem most people are just so self absorbed that they wouldn’t care less about others (guess we’ve all been guilty of that at some point as well). I could think of a million reasons about why people act like that (and many are justifiable), but i’d make this long reply even longer, lol.
I do agree that everyone does things out of interest (even when they think they don’t), but that’s not necessarily a bad thing depending on the situation. I’m sorry to hear that you’ve had to get to that point and that you’ve had little to no support from people, hopefully you’ll find some worthy people eventually if you want to give it a shot again.
You can make long reply if you want. I will read it with pleasure.
I don’t think that selfishness is a good thing, we have to be selfish, because everyone is, but in a world of helpful people, we wouldn’t have to. It took me a long time to realize people try to take advantage of everything, they help you only if they think they can get an advantage, I never helped people for this reason, the advantage I took is that it made me feel good to help people, it was like helping myself. When helping someone, I shoud say to myself:, don’t you have been hurted enough? You want more? Help the person only if you know he or she would do the same at your place. I’m sure the reply will always be “no”. I like doing things for free, because love is free. If you love or help, you don’t have to wait for something in return. But it hurts really too much. I’d like to be hard and insensitive, only interested by myself, it’s the only way to be happy.
In part that’s what i meant with everyone is selfish in a way. My guess is that if helping others felt like crap few would do it (maybe no one), but that’s debatable.
Maybe selfishness is not the word i was looking for when i said it’s a good thing tho, but i was referring to the fact that we do have to draw the line somewhere in order not to be taken advantage of, because like you said, the world isn’t the friendliest place right now. Getting that balance tho is hard as hell, never been to good with it.
You mention you’d like to be hard and insensitive, only interested in yourself, but wouldn’t you be doing the same that you say other people does? been there, and i did end up hating myself even more (not that we’re all the same tho). I know everyone has their reasons to act like they do tho, but changing your essence because of how others are is never a good thing (adjusting your expectations and acting accordingly might be a tad better). Sigh, at times i wonder why society has to make life so damn complicated.
im picturing your frenchy accent and laughing hard haha. i think friendship is tough. i actually hate it to be quite honest. it blows chunks. fuckin messy and emotions get tangled and shit fucks up. not fun.
i was guna try to be positive but reality came out lol
I’ve learned this the hard way as well. You build up someone and make their life better so they don’t feel like you, but as soon as you put them on your shoulders to help hold them above the water, they’re okay with letting you drown because they can breathe still. No one cares about anything but the benefit of themselves. I’ve learned I can still have acquaintances and friendly conversations, but not friends because no one is dependable.
Have you got some example?
You’re right, friendly conversations. I’m so disgusted than I don’t go out from my house anymore, I was very open, and talkative, and now, if I see another human beings, it’s hard for me, I’m so convinced I’m a piece of shit for him or her, bad looking, not interesting, nothing.
I know how that is. Sadly I can’t really give you anything to make you feel better, but if I find a way around it, I will let you know. But Just remember not to rely on people and love yourself.